Dec. 31, 2013
Today's Saying:
New pages listed to the right.
Thank you Kim!
Dec. 29, 2013
Today's Saying:
Joanie and I at BJ's after shopping, 12/28
Getting together for Christmas exchange and dinner.12/19
I know we all love to be with our family, especially at the holidays. But it is also important to have a few good friends. My best friend happens to be my cousin Joanie. She is actually closer in age to my sister Terry. I have known my friends Alice and Olivia for over 20 years now. We all met at church while in our 30's and now we are all "senior citizens. We don't get together as often as we would like, because life keeps us busy. But when we do, we have a good time. My dad was able to meet them and they all called him Uncle Sam like Joanie did. Joanie and I spent half the day together yesterday. We had a late lunch, then spent a few hours store hopping for after Christmas shopping. We ended up at BJ's for dessert. We reflected back on the year and I shared how important it was to have seen my grief counselor Sue. I told Joanie how I needed to be able to share how I felt with someone who knew what I was feeling, but not be depressed by what I was going through. I know God puts people in our lives for different reasons and different seasons. I also have some special online friends that encourage me and I can do the same. Sometimes it is hard to get out and meet with friends and our laptops or smart devices keep us connected. As this year comes to an end, I can see I am finally in the acceptance part of grief. I know that I need my family and friends and that life goes on. So I plan to make more time to spend with both. I also plan to spend more time with the Lord, my eternal friend and he wants me to have an abundant life. (John 10:10) Before you leave, check out my new pages linked at the right. I hope to post again on New Years and will have my Christmas pictures linked. Hugs and blessings.
Dec. 24, 2013
Today's Saying: Busy int he kitchen.
The past few days have been busy but nice. Friday Andrew, Audrina and I went to Disneyland for a few hours so I could get hubby a present there. It is just so pretty at Christmas. It's a Small World gets a complete change to Christmas. One of my favorite ride as a child was Dumbo and I still enjoy it.
On Saturday my whole family(33) minus 2 met up at Miguel's Sr. for dinner and gift exchange. It was really nice and the kids had fun too. My brother and sister took a lot of pictures and will send me some because I did not have my camera. On Sunday I went to church. After church I went to visit my friend Anita and then stopped by the cemetary to leave pointsettias for my parents. I really felt at peace knowing they are together and their family is together and growing. Daniel and Mel baked on Sunday for their jobs and her family. Today I baked gingerbread with the grand kids. They had a nice time and I am sure we created special memories. I did a webpage for them and you can find it by clicking on Gingerbread kids above. The gingerbread house above is linked to my whole Gingerbread Cottage. If I don't come back by Christmas, I want to wish you a very Merry Christmas. Hugs and blessings.
Dec. 20, 2013
Today's Saying: Countdown to Christmas
We were in the high 80's on Monday and now we have rain. I like it to be cold and rainy because that is as close as we will get to snow. I only see snow when I go to the mountains about an hour and half away. I finished wrapping the grandkids gifts and they are excited to see presents under the tree. Eddie has been making his own gifts too. I plan to make gingerbread cookies with the kids on Monday but need to get the ingredients. Hubby and I will go shopping tomorrow for our Christmas food items and stocking gifts for the kids. I already got the grandkids set to go. Last Saturday we all went to breakfast and then the grandkids got to take pictures with Santa and play in the snow area. Then I passed out ornaments to everyone. Everything was great but later hubby got sick(mentioned in precious post) and was down most of the week. Here are a few pictures from that day.
Outside on the warmest day of the week.
Dec. 15, 2013
Today's Saying: Seasonal up and downs
Our weather has been up and down for sure. Low 30's at night and mid 80's during the day. I am still decorating and adjusting and so that has me going up and down and all around. Thursday we took the grands to the movies to see Frozen. The girls took turns sitting with Ampa and I so up and down they went. Eddie was great and Daniel joined us. I liked the movie and I plan to see it again. Afterwards the kids needed to run around a bit after sitting so long(for them) I only had my old cell phone to take pictures that are grainy. Friday we took Eddie and Jazzy to see the living Nativity at out church. Groups of people were taken from station to station to see various scenes from the Bible telling about the birth of Jesus. Eddie said he liked the part when Mary was talking to God. Jazzy liked the camels. Our final up and down is hubby who has the stomach flu and I am praying no one else get's it. The nurse said it is going around. Got to get ready to watch the final Survivor!
Puzzle time after the movie.
Dec. 10, 2013
Today's Saying: Baby it's cold outside!
Disneyland, December 5th.
The nights have been dipping into the low 30's and a few high 20's. That is cold for us in So CA. We rarely get snow where I live so I can enjoy my snow siggies. We went to a wedding in Palm Desert and it was rainy, windy and cold. But we still had a nice time. The following day we drove to Indio to go to the Tamale festival. It was a huge event, much like any other street festival except for the many booths selling tamales. I would still like to make them at our house but it would take several of us working together. So we will see if it happens. Meanwhile, I am working on my Christmas cards. Hubby and I need to do a few errands so I better go! I will leave you with Anne's Meme. I also have a page at my Christmas site called Traditions.
Are traditions important in your family for holidays or do you just celebrate without them? We celebrate Thanksgiving and 4th and sometimes Memorial Day. My dad was very patriotic so we always try to hang flags for those days. I do like to decorate according to the seasons and holidays.
Yes traditions are important to us. I have a whole website on Christmas but I will touch on a few things. We spend Christmas Eve with my inlaws and we use to have Christmas dinner with my parents. Now that mom and dad have passed, we decided to meet up for Christmas dinner on the weekend before Christmas. Then I will make Christmas dinner for my family.
Is there one particular tradition that is most important to your and yours? I like to give each child and grandchild a few ornaments while drinking Mexican hot chocolate. I also like going to Christmas Ever service at church,
Did you incorporate any new traditions with your family that are in addition to ones your parents held? Yes the giving of new ornaments, My parents did not make a big deal with ornaments. I mostly remember the red bulbs and the tinsel. But the year I got engaged, my parents gave us a box of special ornaments. A few years after we were married I started collecting Hallmark ornaments.
Do you think tradition is important? Yes, it gives us something to look forward to that makes the holiday special.
Are there any traditions you do not include that you would like to try? Yes What are they? Tamale making. Jr's Dad has always done it and he is not able to anymore. His brother has taken over, but I want my family to know how too.
Can you tell us why your traditions are special to you and how they benefit you? I like to remember certain occasiosn and try to get an ornament that reflect what is going on. This year Jazzy dressed up as Cinderella for her birthday and Halloween. So I got her a Cinderella ornament. I did the same for Audrina with the Sofia ornament. Eddie got a Mater Truck since he really enjoyed the ride when we went to California Adventure. I also get each grand child a grandchild ornament. I do the same with our kids. When Daniel and Renee move out, I will give them some of my ornaments from my tree just as I did for Andrew when he got married.
Are there daily /weekly/monthly traditions you follow? We go to church weekly as often as possible. We pray at meals, the kids love to do this.
Dec. 5, 2013
Today's Saying: Grand kids make the holidays special!
Taken on Thanksgiving
Grandson Elijah Drew taken today at 20 weeks.
Daniel and Melinda made this snowman out of tumbleweeds.
He started out with a round head and ended up with a flat head.
It's hard to believe that a year ago today I was in Hollywood with my siblings at a Carol King concert. Dad was happy that we were going out together. Little did we know we would lose him so quickly. I still can't believe he is gone and that is normal. My grand kids keep me going and making this Christmas special for them in my main focus. We set up a tree in the family room and they got to decorate it with lots of snowmen. After they were in bed, I made a few adjustments. I am doing several themed trees this year and taking my time since I have 39 years worth of ornaments. We are having a cold snap and it will be going down to below freezing tonight which is unusual for us. Hubby and I hope to go to Disneyland for a few hours today. I plan to start working on my Christmas cards tomorrow evening not that the house is basically decorated. Still have to work on my Disney pics for her and my scrap book. Bye for now.
November 28, 2013
Today's Saying: Happy Thanksgiving!
On Saturday my whole family went to Disneyland. We were there from 8am until midnight.
I treated everyone using some money my dad left me. Tomorrow we go to California Adventure. I will be making
a web page for it in the next few days. Here is a picture from the Jungle Cruise ride. Thursday we will be going to my son's house for Thanksgiving.
I hope you all have a blessed time with your family. Hugs and blessings. Oh, don't forget to visit Thanksgiving Memories
Kid's art to share.
November 22, 2013
Today's Saying: Looking back
Where were you 50 years ago when President Kennedy was killed? I was at school.
I was about 8 so that would put me in 3rd grade. I remember the teachers crying. I remember
them telling us that the president had died and we had to go home. I remember my parents being
sad at dinner time. I faintly remember the news, but I know people were sad and people were praying.
I remember praying at school. I remember the cafeteria and the fish sticks on Fridays. I loved the
Excelsior vanilla ice cream with real cream and vanilla. I remember walking to and from school and catching H bees.
My mom always worked so we had baby sitters. My mom loved the Kennedy family and had tons of books on them. She
also had books on British History. I always remembered my parents having a library full of books. My parents both
loved to read and I remember them both in bed reading when I would say goodnight. I am a reader too, but not hubby.
He reads the paper, and he will read a few articles, but not a book reader. Last year I gave each one of my kids
a box of Golden Books that I had purchased over the years. I want my grand kids to be able to enjoy real books.
Eddie comes home from school and tells me about his book buddy. I need to make time to read with them. Eddie loves
to draw pictures and write something to go with it. Good memories already in the making!
I have been having a lot of spam at my Zonkboard. So please use the link above to get the another tagboard.
If I still get spam at the other tagboard, I will change the url too.
I will have lots of pictures here on Monday so please come back. Have a great weekend! Hugs
Tap the birthday boy for Eddie's birthday page.
November 17, 2013
Today's Saying: Decluttering and remembering.
This weekend I worked on crafts, went through a box of my dad's Christmas cards, separating the things to throw out and the things to save for now. My son put the main tree up because he said he was going to be busy. So I am enjoying the Christmas lights in one room and the Thanksgiving in the other rooms. Planning on going to Disneyland next weekend so pray we all stay healthy because the kids all have sniffles.
I love to do memes because they make me think and smile.
Annie's Meme
This week's meme is called "Hearth and Home".
This turned into a whole web page for me so tap the home button.
I do hope to add to the page in the future.
November 14, 2013
Today's Saying: Having a Roller Coaster Fall
On Veternas Day, I joined my sister at California Adventure which is a part of the Disney Resort. I usually just go on the rides that Audrina can go on. But that day I went on big kid rides. I got to go on Tower of Terror and California Screamin which is a huge roller coaster. I scramed and closed my eyes and held on. The scene of the park from the top was so exciting. The park was decorated for Christmas on the warm 80 degree weather day. It is 90 degrees as I write this but cooler weather is coming. Our weather is just like life, things go up and down. A year ago my dad was coming back from Lake Tahoe, his lungs hurting and having a hard time breathing. He thought he had pnumonia. He eventually had to get his lungs drained and test began for lung cancer. So as I enter the holiday season, I do it with mixed emotions. I want to make it a special Christmas season since last years was a blur for me and this will be the last one here in this house. I need to see it through the eyes of my grandkids and remember the real meaning of all seasons.
November 10, 2013
Today's Saying: Happy 6th birthday to my grandson Eddie
We love you! Ninja party pictures to come.
November 7, 2013
Today's Saying: Memes for memory!
I love to do memes because they make me think and smile.
Annie's Meme Nov 6, 2013 Sights and Sounds
"it explores how sight and sound effect our emotions and feelings."
1. Do any smells remind you of anything or anyone? Do they evoke feelings and emotions for you? Playdough reminds me of kindergarten, Pine Sol reminds me of my mom, she liked to clean. She did not wear perfumes and dad did not wear colognes because of allergies and my sister had asthma. Mentholatum remind me of my grandmothers and Bengay remind me of my paternal grandfather. Fresh cut grass reminds me of my maternal grand father who had his own landscape business. Baby Lotion remind me of babies. A pot of beans cooking reminds me of my paternal grandmother. Certain church songs remind me of my maternal grandmother. The smell of home made tacos remind me of my dad because he loved them. Fruit certs reminds me of my hubby. He had one in his mouth when he gave me that first kiss.
2. Do you have a signature perfume that you love to wear? I don't wear them because of my allergies. I did use to wear Loves Baby Soft Lemon and my husband really liked it. We tried to find something similar, but no luck.
3. What kinds of scents do you find pleasing? Citrus scents, holiday scents.
4. Do you enjoy burning candles in your home? What scents do you like? I like seasonal scents like cinnamon spice in the fall and coconut in the summer because it remind me of the beach. Only Yankee candles since I don't have a reaction to them.
5. If you had to choose one landscape to view every day, would it be a city, farm, forest and country perhaps with pond or lake, or the ocean? I like the the ocean and I enlarged a photo from our trip to Hawaii. I also lakes and mountains.
6. Do you like to have art hanging in your home? I have one picture my mother in law painter years ago and gave us. I love the colors and the country. She also did portraits. Sadly she lost her sight to diabetes.
November 3, 2013
Today's Saying: We are expecting a grandson!
the whole family was there.
So in April we will be enjoying Elijah Drew.
He is looking face down and would not move much. Asleep?
Marina drank some fruit juice and moved around and
then he moved enough to see he was a boy!
Award Day at the gym. Great job girls!
Eddie, Audrina, Jazzy at Trunk N Treat
Eddie, Audrina, Jazzy at Star Wars Event at Corona Library.
October 31, 2013
Today's Saying: Happy Halloween!
The Back in Time Meme from Annie at Cottage by the Sea
1. What games were popular with you as a child? I liked playing hop scotch and a game called skip tape or chinese jump rope. You needed elastic for this game. I remember also making one with rubber bands. At school I liked tether ball and the monkey bars. I would wind tie my sweater around the bar and then climb on one foot front over and the other behind. I would go around and around. Sometimes I would sit on the bar, flip back while still holding on, release and then flip out and land on my feet. I was fearless. I also loved the merry go round. It was all metal and I would like down and just look at the clouds. I still like going aroud around. My mom new I was a tomboy so she had me wear shorts under my dress. I liked playing monopoly, life, operation and Scrabble.
Any TV program that you looked forward to? I liked the Wonderful World of Disney. Our whole family would watch it on Sunday evenings. I also liked I Love Lucy. I liked Daffy Duck.
2. What subject rocked your world in school? Science, history and PE. I liked music and choir too. In Hish school, I enjoyed physiology were I disected a fetal pig. I had to know every part of the body and every bone.
3. What subject did you really dislike, if any. Why? Math, it was hard! The fear of failing in it was stronger so I avoided it.
4. What did you want to be when you grew up? I wanted to be so many things In Elementary school I wanted to be an astronomer, archealogist, and scientist. When I was in Jr High, I wanted to go into the medical field. Math was hard for me and I figured I could not make it. By High School I changed it to Psychology and be a counselor or Social Worker. Did it happen? In a round about way. I did get my degree in Social Ecology from UCI. But I had already been working part time with the Postal Service and figured I would stay there while raising my family. In the 1987 I took my first computer class and then got a temporary job in the Retail Marketing Department. It opened my eyes to the world of computing. I retired from there in 2010. I did lay counseling at my church for several years.
5. Do you still keep in touch with old friends from school days? Only a few. We interact mostly through Facebook now.
6. If you could turn back the hands of time, would you go back in time? Yes for a few things. To pursue a nursing degree. I would spend more time with my mom and dad and ask them lots of questions.
7. What did you consider a good time when you were a teen? I loved listening to music and buying 45's I was also in a Youth group at my church all through Jr High and High. It is how I met my husband.
8. What or who influenced you most from your younger years? Why? I would say my dad. He encouraged me
while still allowing me to be me. He helped me learn to ride a bike and a skate board though it was my mom who bought them for me.
He was the one that helped me with school projects Most important, he gave me the hugs I needed in life. I miss his hugs so much!
I had a great relationship with my grandmothers. I did not appreciate my mom's until I was a mom of teens. When I finally
learned to know the real me, I understood my mom. I was able to tell her this and it made our relationship grow. So my mom
also influnced me. Funny how when we are young we adore our parents, when we are in our teens we ignore them. When we are
parents, we finally get it, well kind of. :)
I had a few teachers that were great. 4th grade Miss Helm, first teacher that made me feel special. Mrs. Allen, 7th grade English teacher
Mr Haffner, 10th grade advanced World History, 12th grade Sociology and Psychology.
October 29, 2013
Today's Saying: Transitions are expected.
My computer keeps crashing, so I have been busy copying files to an external hard drive.
I have been looking for computers online. So many to choose from.
I don't want a ten key but that is the way the come now.
Renee and I have been walking and I am enjoying the
I have also been scrapping our fall pictures and enjoying it.
Now that the weather is cooler, we need to work in the garage.
Eddie posing at the Star Wars Fundraiser for Corona Library.
Taken at the School Carnival.
This leaf made me think of my dad, he had a big heart.
My latest Willow Tree, Remembering You.
Church Harvest Costume Party around 1992.
Andrew as Luke Skywalker around 1986.
October 25, 2013
Today's Saying: Happy Birthday to my hubby Jr.
We have had fall weather all week and it has been so nice. The kids are getting excited about Halloween. Tonight we are going to the Halloween Carnival with the grands. Daniel works to day but he took his dad out for lunch on Wed. Then we will all be celebrating on Sunday.
Feeling better now that I colored my hair.
Going to lunch soon
Have a great weekend!
October 22, 2013
Today's Saying: Fall into Family and Friends.
I had a really nice weekend enjoyable weekend. Saturday I slept in and enjoyed my coffee and breakfast. Then while Renee and the kids went to Jazzy's Gym and shopping, I stayed home and took a long bath. I had a good book, and iced tea and me.
Hubby brought home take out and we
just watched tv and enjoyed a quiet house. Later Renee had the kids asleep,
she and Edward, and my son Daniel and his girlfriend went to play pool. They
came back laughing about a kareoke mishap. It means a lot to me to see my kids
happy. I really like Daniel's girlfriend and I am hoping they get married in the
future. I spent the evening scrapping.
Hubby made me some eggs and veggies for breakfast and we enjoyed out coffee before
heading to church. The message was really good at church. After church I went to the store to get fall flowers and some mini pumpkins.
My cousin Joanie and I went to the cemetarty. I cleaned my parents site and we fixed the flowers. Corrie Ten Booms plot is just left
of the tree on the upper left of me.
Afterwards we went to the Orange Circle in downtown Orange. We had lunch at the Blue Frog.Then we hit some of the antique stores. Later we stopped in Starbucks and looked at our pictures and just laughed. We plan to do this again when the holidays are here.
Look at these cute things!
It was a great weekend! Just what I needed.
I found this at Toni's By the way...
1. Hayride or Hike? Both.
2. Picking out Pumpkins or Picking Apples? Pumpkins!
3. Hot Apple Cider or Hot Chocolate with Marshmallows?
--- Pumpkin Spice Coffee and Mexican Hot Chocloate
4. Fall Festival or Trick-or-Treating? Fall Festival/Trunk N Treat.
5. Roasting Marshmallows or Bobbing for Apples? Roasting.
6. Cute Little Scarecrows or Ugly, Scarey Monsters? Scarecrows.
October 19, 2013
Today's Saying: Happy Birthday Mom in heaven.
and Get your feet moving and live life.
My mom would have turned 79 this year. Hard to believe that a year ago today my dad and sister picked me up so we could visit mom at Fairhaven Cemetery. It was a cool overcast day. We stopped to get flowers and dad took his time choosing what he wanted to get her. Dad took a little pail that he carried in the back of the car. He trimmed the grass aroud her headstone, and sprayed and cleaned it too. We talked for awhile and then he went and did the same to my mom's parents sites that were in the same column, around 5 rows up. We looked for Corrie Ten Boon's site too. She is most known for her book called The Hiding Place. Her Christian, Dutch Family hid many Jewish people during the war. She spent time in a concentration camp too and survived.
She has many famous quotes. I have posted a picture of her gravestone before.
After we left that area, we drove to another area of the cemetery so dad could do the same to the headstones
of his mom, dad, cousin and grandfather. My sister Terry and I said that we would carry on the tradition with the bucket.
I got a picture from my sister Ann, and she had visited today. As Christian, we know we will see them again someday. As
children, we still miss our parents.
Today hubby and I had our "date day" We stopped at Walgreens so I could pick up pictures and Calcium. Then we headed to
"The Crossings Shopping center. Hubby dropped me off at the Hallmark Store while he went to get a light lunch. They were playing an old Beatles CD and I enjoyed the music while I looked at Christmas cards. I saw the individual cards and got that familiar ache when I saw the parents section. Hubby said I could go to the Cemetery and leave them a card this year.
After we went to see the movie Gravity. We did not want to wait to see the 3D version and I am kind of glad we didn't. It was a great movie, full of beauty, terrifying excitement. Sandra did a great job and George Clooney was his cool suave self. I would see it again if my son wanted to go. There was one scene in the movie that really touched me and that is where I got the second saying(in my words) I won't say to much in case you have not seen it.
Afterwards, we went to Best Buy to look at computers and I asked lots of questions. I am going to need a new laptop soon since this one is running so slow and will be 6 years old in Jan. I am also interested in the new Surgace Pro since you can use a flash drive with it and a keyboard. I will do some more research to get what I need the most. After that we went to BJ's for dinner. We share the Hawaiian grilled Maha Mahi. They also have the best coffee there!
I am going to leave with these two pictures from last year.
Dad already looking tired.
At the Chili Pepper in Orange, one of mom and dad;s favorite places.
Not the best picture, but I am still glad I have it.
Click on the Tractor below to see our Pumpkim Patch Day.
October 13, 2013
Today's Saying: Making Memories for today and tomorrow.
I went to Disneyland on Saturday
with Andrew and Audrina.
Sunday was a family day at the Pumpkin Patch!
Today I am tired but happy.
A few pictures from Disneyland:
Halloween Decor.
Audrina's favorite ride is Little Mermaid.
This Mermaid silhouette makes me think of this picture:
This is my 4th grandchild! Taken at 9 weeks.
Marina is 12 1/2 weeks now and due at the end of Apri.
Please keep her and the baby in prayer.
Click on the Tractor above to see our Pumpkim Patch Day
October 10, 2013
Today's Saying: Colors on my mind.
Yesterday we had much needed rain.
Edward cooked hamburgers and Daniel made a pie.
Melinda came over to
with Daniel.
There was colored paper all over the dining room table.
I was going through crafts, and deciding on colors.
When I was done, I sat down and had my tea with some pie.
Today the sun was out and hubby brought me breakfast in bed.
Then we went
for a few things.
We enjoyed the fall colors as we drove through the canyon.
I enjoyed time at Hobby Lobby while hubby was at Home Depot.
As you walk in, there is orange and black for fall. Then
multi colors for Christmas and the fabric section. In spite
of the fact that things were not clear in my eyes, I still enjoyed
looking at things. I really need some new glasses!
Then we met up at Target for a few more things before having
Now it is time for
Enjoy the rest of the week. Hugs
Ok, just a post blog note. I just watched Glee, a trbute to Cory Monteith.
I like the way they expressed their grief and love for their friend.
After the show they said there is help if you have a problem because
the actor died from drugs though they did not say that in the movie.
They didn't have to since the media covered it prior to the show.
They sang some heartfelt songs like "I Stand by You"(The Pretenders) and I've Seen Fire, I've Seen Rain"(James Taylor)
I watched this show with my dad once. He said I liked musicals like my mom.
Music really does touch the soul is a special way.
October 7, 2013
Today's Saying: Creating Memories
On Friday, my son's girlfriend came over
so we could Scrap
I was sad because a friend's son passed away
He was around my son's age-28 and had a bad heart.
On Saturday I had lunch with
at Olive Garden.
After lunch I went
for more Christmas gifts.
Then I came home to watch some TV.
I went to bed early.
Sunday I got early to pray and read my
Then we went to church
Renee was sick.
and she needed rest.So we took the grand kids to church.
Afterwards we went to eat lunch with the rest of the family
Then we headed home to relax and I worked on my webpages.
I am redoing some of my "Homework pages"
It was a nice weekend!
Now Daniel wants to try scrapping!
I missed the girls gym day, but here they are.
October 4, 2013
Today's Saying:
As I mentioned in a previous post, working on my website has been therapy for me. I have been adding adoptions to my site and while doing so, I found this one. It pretty much was similar to one that I have related to in the past about being afraid
to fail, there for not trying because of the fear. I can look back to several things I did not do because the fear of failing was so strong, I changed my direction to avoid it. If I had life to do over again, I would have gone into the medical field. But reality is that I can't go back. What I can do is share this with my kids and then encourage them to try in spite of what they feel. Several years aago I read a book and it said it is better to try and fail than not try at all. At least if we fail, we gain experince. We can see that
we failed at that one thing, but we can try again. I remember my dad saying that he failed at things but he moved on or tried again.
I think I learned that failure is not an option from my mom. I saw her as super woman and I wanted to be her. What I learned later was that she was afraid of lots of things, but she did things anyways. I can't go back, but I can look forward in a more positive way.
If I do become afraid, I will look to God for strength and courage.
Fear saying :
October 1, 2013
Today's Saying: Changing Seasons
Reading
working on web pages.
Waiting for
to really get here.
Glad my fall programs are back
Like watching my grands play.
More Christmas shopping done!
Tap the boy to see the special page I made for my dad.
Thank you for all the nice comments about my dad's page. It took a long time for me to get it done. I spent hours and hours working on his montage while he was sick. So glad he got to see most of it too. The pictures on his page were taken from the montage. I told my grief counselor and she said that getting it done for his birthday was good for me. Working on my webpages has been therapy for me. Journaling is good for therapy too. I know that many of my friends have been in my shoes and I am thankful for the support.
As much as I had fun playing Farmville these past years, I seem to have lost the desire to play. It was getting to crazy with all the quest and one farm after another and taking up to much time. I still play a bit on my Mema's farm, but not much. I am keeping up with my Bible reading and that is good. I have also been going through my closet and getting rid of things. I packed a lot of my summer clothes away to make room for winter things. So things are getting done but there is still so much to do.
I know our goal is to move but I am not rushing anything and neither is hubby. My grief counselor said that she does not recommend a move so soon after my loss, and waiting a year is good. So many changes and they will happen but not all at once. I do know that I feel a change in me. I guess I am finally accepting my dad's death and that is good. I had a dream last night with him. I remember I was in a big store and it seems like the Wal-Mart in Temecula. I assume it was because I went there with him once. Well I was in the middle and my dad was walking around like he was looking for someone. I remember talking to him but I was not crying in this dream. I remember he looked healthy, maybe even younger. At some point in the dream I realized he was gone and I was ok. That is all I remember. When I woke up I thought about the dream. I guess I understand that he will always be a part of my life, just not in it anymore. My grandkids say Papa Sam is in heaven with his new body because that is what we have told them. I felt at peace with the dream. I still get those pangs of loss, but that is normal. I feel like I can move on now with a sense of purpose. Seasons change and life goes on. Hugs
Septemeber 24, 2013
Today's Saying: Timing is everything.
Reading
working on web pages.
Finally
Tomorrow we watch the grand daughters at
and maybe off to
Happy for Renee for
Doing great in school!
Tap the boy to see the special page I made for my dad.
Happy Friday! I use to think that the days went by quickly when I worked,
and that it would slowdown when I retired. But I find that the days go by quickly everyday.
Everything is based on time here. What time we get up an go to bed and everything else between.
I see my daughter who juggles child care, medical assistant school and housework and homework.
Everything is on a time schdule. She is my baby and she is 24 and the times has just passed on by.
She says how her friend have all graduated and she is just starting out. I told her not
to put a time frame on herself. I got through college in 4 years and got a degree and when I was
done, I just wanted to start a family. Then it did not happen the way I wanted and it took 4 years before
I had a baby in my arms. When my dad was dying, he said the years had gone by so quickly and
now every minutes counted. There was so much he still wanted to do. He told my husband to retire and enjoy life.
So it does matter how we live life with the time we have.
I met with my grief counselor on Thursday and the 3 hours flew by. She is so understanding and we have a lot in common.
I think a big thing for me was acknowledging that in spite of my feelings, I have choices on how I want to spend my time here.
There is a verse in the bible that says this
"But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and
a thousand years are like a day." 2 peter 3:8 To me it says that there is no time in heaven for us to worry about. There is no tears, no sorrow.
Only God knows when our time here is over so I want to make the most of it!
Septemeber 24, 2013
Today's Saying: Looking at past Memories.
Reading my webpage stories
and reading
Waiting for
Tap the boy to see the special page I made for my dad.
Added a few more pictures.
Hi friends,
I felt good that I finished my dad's Tribute page by his birthday. I have added a few more pictures
to it. I went to bed so late on Saturday-Sunday and got up early for church. We are studying the book of
James at church and my dad studied that book with my brother in law Ernie. I have my dad's Bible that he
used for that study and it gives me comfort when I see it. After church I stopped at Ralph's Market and got
a pretty fall arrangement for my dad along with a birthday baloon.
My sister Terry met up at our house and we headed to the cemetery. My brother and his wife was there and two of their kids. My sister
Ann and her husband were there too. My hubby took a blanket out of the car and we sat down and talked about dad.
It was very peaceful, and I was not sad. After we took a few pictures there, we went to The Chili Pepper for lunch.
It was one of my paren't favorite places when they lived in Santa Ana. The last time I was there was with my dad and sister Terry
when we went with dad to leave flowers and a pumpkin at my mom's grave. Dad also left flowers for my mom's mom and then his mom.
I know where my parents are but out of tradition and love, I hope to visit my parents on special days.
It was nice to get so many kind words on FB as I shared about my dad's birthday. This is what I posted on FB.
Today would have been my dad's Sammy Sandoval 80th birthday. I really miss him, but I am at peace knowing I will see him again someday. I am blessed to have a wonderful family that is there for each other. This includes my extended family. I am sure my parents are happy knowing their family is staying close.
The love of the Lord holds us together. "This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." Ps 118:24
I have been looking back at past pages I made that are on my website. I plan to redo a few, but I am so glad
I have the memories there. I am going to print them out and scrap them. So much to do, just need to get busy!
Septemeber 22, 2013
Today's Saying: Happy Birthday Dad!
Worked on a special webpage just for you
while sitting in your chair, using your lamp.
Today we will leave flowers at the cemetary and go to one of your
favorite palces to eat-The Chili Pepper in Orange.
I started my Christmas shopping today.
Tap the boy to see the special page I made for my dad.
Septemeber 19, 2013
House Decorated for fal
Working on Webpages
Drinking Bengel Spice Tea
Watching the last how of Grey's Anatomy
Going to try to get to bed earlier.
Our weather has cooled down to the 80's in the day and 50's at night so this is our fall. It means no
air conditioning and a better nights sleep. Well it would be better if I got myself to bed earlier. But I have been busy
reworking some of my web pages. First it was my Figs, and now my Julie Bears. Beacause of this, I have made a new blog friend
named Marci. Well our paths crossed long ago and then we met up on FV and now she is blogging again. Her link is posted under my friends.
Darylynn has cut way back on blogging and I am praying she does not leave us. I do enjoy reading her post. Now if I could just get
Judy back to blogging, I would be in blogging heaven. I am so thankful for my friends that visit me.
I met with Sue my grief counselor with Grief Share and she said I am doing the right things as far as grieving. I am not keeping things in,
and I sharing my feelings, and trying to be active in everyday living. Your kind words mean a lot to me too! She said that I lost someone very close to me and it will take time, ususally 2 years. Somedays will be ok and others will be hard. Saturday would have been my dad's 80th birthday and I am not sure how I will feel
that day. My sister and I will go to the cemetary to leave flowers and have lunch.
I was going to start sorting things next week but my arm is hurting. This morning I moved and I felt this super sharp
pain in my shoulder. Then my hand went numb and I knew it was the shoulder since I have had shoulder problems before. See what happens
when you yank things of the washer! A shirt was entangled in another shirt and I was pulling to hard. So I have been icing it today.
Last night hubby and I watched Survivor and we also watch Hawaii Five 0 together. Off to the side of our tv is a small
tree the grands helped me decorate for fall. They remind me to turn the lights on. Happy fall friends!
Septemeber 17, 2013
Working on Webpages
Audrina's Birthday Page linked below.
Jazmyn and Audrina started their gymnastic class on Saturday. They were both dressed so cute.
Audrina jumped right in and Jazmyn took awhile to get going, but by the end they both were laughing and enjoying themselves.
Audrina's grandma was there along with her uncle and 2 cousins. Hubby and I were there with Renee and Eddie. Eddie
kept himself busy with his Leapfrog while the rest of us watched. We will go again next Saturday.
I forgot my camera and my little Iphone does not take great pictures in low lighting. I have decided that I am going to use
some of my dad's money to get a really nice camera that takes fast pictures in any lighting.
Later that evening, Renee and I
watched a movie together and enjoyed some stove popped popcorn that Renee made. While we watched the movie, I played with my website
and was looking for Julie Bears. So I am going through tons of files again just like when I was looking for Figs.
I have my website for 2 more years so I want to enjoy it and the grands like to look at the pictures too. Sorry to find
out that Julie of Bear Essential Graphics and Karol of Home Sweet Home both closed there sites. So sad to see such great
graphic artist leave, but who blames them. We have lost the world of country graphics and the great
times we had with our country web homes. Irene of Graphics by Irene around and she said it was sad to see how things have
changed. We were like a big family.
I am having fun with the cuties that Judy has been making for me. I know she is trying to help me with keeping my spirit up.
I feel like I am on a
Just when I feel better, something triggers a memory and I get so sad.
I am going to meet with a grief counselor on Today.
Probably good timing since my dad's birthday is coming up and I know it will be a hard day for me. My grief emails really help and I love the scripture that goes along with it.
Sunday we went to Balboa Beach. It was near 100 in our town and mid 70's at the beach. We took the ferry across the bay and stopped for Pizaza. It was the worse pizza we had and we all laughed over it. We stopped at a store and fot the kids a few things to play with. It was nice watching
Jazzy and Eddie enjoying the waves and playing in the sand. I collected shells and dug my feet in the sand. I was thinking about the
clear warm waters of the beach at Maui. I pray I can go back one more time. I will always be thankful that I was able to
go with my dad. We are only about 35 minutes from the beach
Isn't this the perfect adoption for the the beach day.
Septemeber 13, 2013
Today's Sayings
Seasons are changing.
We had cooler weather for a few days and I decided to start decorating for fall. I love this season though we really don't get it unil mid October. So happy to use these cute Itty Bitty friends that Judy has made for me. She really wanted to cheer me up since I had been feeling down.
I finsed Audrina's birthday page which is linked below. Both the girls like to see their
Thanks to my dad, we will be taking the grands to Disneyland for the Christmas season.
Meanwhile Ampa is helping with the grands
We have been doing more things around the house because another change will be coming. We are going to sell our house and find something smaller and single story. Not sure if we will stay in the same city. We have been working in the yard
We have a guy doing some repairs that Jr. can't do. When I am not busy I am playing FV 
I am doing my when the house is quiet. I will say a special prayer for my friend Dru who lost her furbaby Billy Elliot. I know the pain of losing a furbaby. Also to Annie whose town had a huge fire after just rebuilding from Hurricane Sandy. Friends help each other through the sad times.
Septemeber 11, 2013
Today's Sayings
Remembering 911
Reading Exodus in the
Cooler weather today so
decorating Working on Webpages
Audrina's Birthday Page linked below.
Loving these cute graphics!
Watching a Burt Bacharach Special
Today I miss my mom. I was changing the tv channel when I found a program featuring the music of Burt Bacharach Best hits.
As soon as I heard Dionne Warwick sing, I thought of my mom. She had the album and would play it often. So in an instant I was taken back to our family room at our Hickory House, and I can see the place the record player and albums were. It made me think of how mom was always dressed to fashion. I think of the happy times we shared. It made me think of of a later time when dad had just had heart surgery. I asked her what she was feeling and her eyes were misty. I remember telling her how she tried to be strong on the outside for us but I knew she was worried because she was very sensitive and hid it. She asked how I knew that and I told her "because I am like you mom." I said how we both loved music and we really felt the music and the words really spoke to us. I told her how we found it hard to say things, but that we could write it out on paper. We both liked to give little gifts to say I love you. We both loved to read and enjoyed receiving books as gifts. We both loved musicals. I remember how happy she was when I told her this. So I listen to the music with a big ache in my heart, but I am thankful I said those things to her and that I still remember! So happy my sister Terry got to keep all mom and dad's albums. Music is so powerful! "What the world needs now is love sweet love." 'That's What Friends are For."
Septemeber 8, 2013
Today's Saying: Happy 30th birthday to Daniel!
Happy Grandparent's day!
Septemeber 3, 2013
Today's Saying: Happy 3rd Birthday Audrina!
Happy 1st day of preschool Audrina!
With hot weather, I did not mind getting drenched everywhere!
My daughter in laws mom behind me-Jessica
Son Andrew behind Jessica. We got a mint julep after this.
Septemeber 1, 2013
Today's Saying:
I took the picture of this saying today while I was at the New Hobby Lobby in the next city on the OC border. I found this store in Temecula last year and loved it but Temcula is 45 minutes away and this new store is 15 minutes away. So hubby dropped my off the store while he ran a few errands and then joined me. I looked at this picture and I have seen Live, Laugh, Love many times but this was the first time Happy was added to it. That really opened my eyes because since I lost my dad, there have been a lot of sad days. Many times I feel so unmotivated and unproductive. There is so much I can do, but I just stare at the computer and play games. I do enjoy my family get togethers and my grandkids do light up my life, but there is still an emptiness. But inspite of how I feel, I know I have to move on with living. I picked up a couple of scrap books since they were 50% off and a few things for the kids for Christmas.
At my August 21 post, I mentioned the online place called Grief Share. I am finding the daily emails helpful. I contacted the coordinator in my city. After sharing some emails with "Sue" she had decided to meet with me one on one. I can't meet in the evening since we watch the grandkids while Renee is at school. I need to make some changes and I will post that on Monday. The one thing I am doing that is productive and healing is jouraling. Church is good for me too. After church I am having lunch with friends. We laugh a lot when we get together and laughter is good medicine. Have a great Labor Day weekend.!
August 28 2013
Today's Saying: Wedding Pictures linked on the left.
August 27 2013
Today's Saying: Family Fun,
looking back and looking forward
I had a great mini vacation get away this past weekend in San Clemente
As I mentioned in my previous post,my neice got married on Friday and so the whole family was there to celebrate.
Hubby and I got an early chick in at The Best Western Casa Blanca Inn and our room was very nice!
After settling in, we went to the San Clemente Pier to have lunch and we ran into my son and his
girlfriend so they joined us at the Fishermen's on the Pier. We got a great seat and enjoyed out lunch,
Everyone went back to our room to get ready for the wedding. The wedding will have it's own page.
So I will go to the next morning.
My siblings all spent the night at the same hotel and some of us enjoyed coffee out by the fountain.
Later we and we all met up for lunch at Rancho Alvilas,
a place we use to eat at with our parents in Santa Ana. Eveyone went home after that except us.
We decided to walk around and check out some of the stores. We were really good and did not buy anything
at the candy store that has a lot of the old school candies like Sugar Daddies and wax candy soda bottles.
We decided we did not feel like going out for dinner so we picked up some things at Ralphs' to go along
with my left over soup. It was nice just to relax in our room. I enjoyed the jacuzzi tub the room had.
My feet really hurt after a night of dancing in heels.
Sunday morning we listened to our church service
while we enjoyed our breakfast. Hubby and picked up some items from the breakfast room. After we check out
we headed to a taco shop and had the best fish tacos. We did a little more window shopping and I found the cutest
little shell turtles for the grandkids. Later we stopped in to have a shaved ice, passionfruit, pineapple and coconut flavor.
Hubby decided to take the highway through the Cleveland National forest to get home instead of the long way around the on
busy freeways. It was a very nice rural drive. We pulled off the highway to check out Lazy W Ranch, a place we had
been with our families and church back in 1973 Labor Day weekend. That was 40 years ago. We walked around
the empty camp and shared our memories. Luckily the newly remodeled bathrooms were open and after using them we left the camp.
Such great memories of Labor Day weekend family camp.
Cabins either for families or teens.
We teen girls had so much fun sneaking out to the boys side.
We stopped at a little country store and had an Orange Julius and picked up a slice of home made lemon cheesecake.
We pulled over to take picture of Lake Elsinore before heading down. We could see the large area of the forest that
had burned a few weeks ago.
When we got to our city, we decided to go to the movies to see The Butler. It was a very good movie that I would see again. I think it is a movie that everyone should see to learn more about civil rights and history of the US. The actors were very good and I can see some Oscars coming from this movie. It was a nice weekend.
As of today my daughter Renee will be a student in a program to be a Medical Assistant. It is a year long program so we will
be watching the kids from 4-10pm Monday through Friday. I better go now and take them outside.
August 23 2013
Today's Saying:
I found the beach sign at Facebook and liked what it said. Hubby and I are going to San Clemente today for the weekend. Our niece is getting married Friday evening at the Casino Hubby got a room for two nights so we could celebrate our anniversary. All our kids are going but no grandbabies. My siblings will be staying at the same hotel too, so we can all have brunch together. My dad new about the wedding and had set aside a gift for the bride to be. I really do feel good when I am with my family. We have lost our parents, but we still have each other and our families and sharing these family times is important to all of us. Hubby and I need this weekend because our life will be a lot busier starting next week. I will save the details for my next blog post but it is not another grandchild. I better get packed now. I hope to post again on Monday. Have a great weekend!
August 21 2013
Today's Saying: Riding the Roller Coaster....
I know I am not alone if the way I am feeling. Just when I am feeling better, I hit a fast course down that I have no control over. I know I am grieving the loss of my dad and my mom and it is a process I have to go through. I have to go through the 5 Stages of Loss and Grief
I grew up learning to supress my feelings. It took years to learn that my emotions were real and not to hide. And so instead of acting like everything is ok, I am free to admit my true feelings. Feelings change with circumstance.
Yesterday I had lunch with some friends and I enjoyed their company and I knew that I could talk freely because they had both lost their parents. We all agreed that you don't realize how much someone means to you until you lose them. I always had a close relationship with my dad. When I lost my mom, I knew I needed to spend as much time with him as I could.
I am thankful for that. I felt good that my friends knew how I felt and understood my feelings.
Today I found the birthday card he gave me last year. It made me glad that I have this card where he said he loved me. So I just have to trust in God, and hold on while I am on the ride of my life.
August 18 2013
Today's Saying:
Party Update
Great weekend! Jazzy's party, Church and lunch at Fridays.
I posted a link on the left to Jazzy's party.
It was fun to make her page and she really liked it.
August 15 2013
Today's Saying:
As I get older, I am not as outgoing as I use to be. I was so involved in school activities when I was in Jr high and high school.
I got married young so I did not stay connected with lots of friends, but I have stayed connected with a few over the years. We don't get to see each other very often, but email and Facebook help. When my kids were young, I was really busy with my family and once I moved to Corona, I got connected with my church and was very busy with that. Then in 2007 my daughter got pregnant and my ministry changed to my family. In the past 5 years I helped my daughter with her kids, my son with his daughter, and spent time and cared for my parents. I am not ready to jump back into anythying, but I do miss getting together with friends. Life is so busy for everyone and it is hard to connect. Other times, I am the one that just doesn't want to go out and do anything.
One thing I have enjoyed over the years is my online friends. Some have come and some have gone. Some are around on FB and others pop in here and I am thankful for that. I was visiting old graphic sites(yes there are a few out there) and I found Mary's. She had a link on grief that I found and there is a support group at a local church and I am thinking of going. Reading confirmed that I am still grieving the loss of my dad and it takes time. There is not a time frame though it has been 6 months. This birthday was hard for me because I always looked forward to getting a call from him.
I will leave you with a picture of dad and I last year on my birthday at my daughter Jazzy's party. We were in a party zoo warehouse and it was hot so I look awful. But I do treasure this picture of us. The 2nd picture is from this year.
Jazzy and I celebrating our birthday breakfast at Polly's.
August 12, 2013
Today's Saying: Happy Anniversary, Happy birthday!
It has been a nice weekend, celebrating my 39th anniversary. Friday my daughter and I went shopping and I got a free gift at Sephora for my birthday. I got a new blouse and my daughter got a dress for the wedding later this month. Jazmyn got a new shirt for preschool. We had lunch in the food court and snacked on chocolates from Sees. When we got home, I decided I wanted another haircut so off I went.
Saturday I came down to a dozen beautiful rosesa and great card. Hubby has always gotten me such meaningful cards.
We relaxed for awhile and then left to Victoria Gardens in Rancho Cucamonga. We walked around a bit, bought some Mrs Fields cookies,
rode the trolley, and then went to Cheesecake Factory for lunch. I had salmon with a wonderful lemon dill flavor, asparagus and salad.
Hubby had the Shepherds pie. We knew we were going to get some shaved ice, but were happy to get a complimentary anniversary sundae.
After leaving there, we walked around and then got our shaved ice. We sat down and enjoyed it while talking about the shaved ice
my dad and hubby got in Hawaii. Later we went to a scrap book store in the next city so I could get something to make my grand daughter for her birthday.
We were going to go to the movies but decided to go later. We stopped at Kohls instead so I could get a few things.
It was nice day for sure!
We enjoyed a great message at church and then met up with the grand kids. Eddie was telling me all about David and his friend
Jonothan and so did Jazmyn. We did not take Audrina with us since she can't sit still for the movies yet so we said goodbye.
We took the kids to Miguel's for lunch then then we went to see Planes. It was a cute movie and some of the storyline
went along with what our Pastor shared in church. About not being afraid to do what we can do to serve others, and reaching
our full potential. After the movies we stopped to get some sorbet to enjoy on the way home. Now we are just relaxing to be ready
for another busy day. My grand daughter Jazzy turns 4 on the 12th which happens to be my birtday too! Her birthday party will be celebrated on the 17th.
I am a little sad thinking this will be my first birthday without my parents. He was with us last year for our party and you could tell he
was losing weight and looking more tired. Now he has his "new body" and will live forever in peace. That is my hope and eternal joy. Hugs
August 8, 2013
Today's Saying: It's all in the Timing....
On Tuesday my husband and I took our grandson to Downtown Disney for lunch at the Rainforest Cafe.
He enjoyed the Disney Store, but end up chosing an elephant from the RF gift shop. He loves elephants!
We took him to celebrate the beginning of Kindergarten.
After lunch, I went into the park and waited
90 minutes to ride the Racers at Cars Land. Andrew joined me at the end of the ride and we headed over to
Disneyland to wait for Splash Mountain Log Ride. Another 90 minute wait to ride ending with a 50 foot wild wet plunge!
We headed to New Orleans Square and got a Mint Julep drink and then took they train to Tomorrow Land.
We were able to get right on the Star Tours ride and then we waited another 90 minutes to get on
Space Mountain. Waiting goes faster when you have someone to talk to.
Wednesday we all got up early to see Eddie off to his first day of school. It was a family affair for sure.
Eddie's mom and dad and sister were joined by Ampa, Mema and cousin Audrina. Once in class, Edward waited in line
so that Eddie could meet his teacher Mrs. Johnson. Mrs Johnson was also Renee's kindergarden teacher 20 years earlier.
Where has the time gone? Eddie liked his first day but said it was too short. After that I left to the DMV where I was
there for 3 hours to get a drivers renewal. All because I waited until the last minute and I wanted new picture.
After a busy 2 days of getting up early, I slept in getting 10 hours of much needed sleep! I had
a dream with my dad and he was happy and not sick. Each of my siblings has had a similar dream. I think we are all realizing that dad is ok, with mom and the Lord and he is ok. My dad has been gone 6 months today. It is hard to believe and half a year has gone by.
I thought about how our lives are based on time. The time we were born, the time we died, the time we woke up, the time we went to bed. Ecclesiastes 3:1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens. I know my season of grieving is not over, but I have to remember
what my dad said "You have your family, you will be ok" I do need to make better use of my time and I am scrapping again
I also started reading the whole Bible again. I have read it through twice and it is time to do it again. I started a reading plan
plan through You Version. It will be in Chronogical order instead of book by book. I can read on my Iphone, computer or
or through one of my Bibles. A few of my online friends will be reading also so that will be nice. I am excited about using my time more wisely!
I leave you with a picture of me spending time the grand babies and having fun!
August 5, 2013
Today's Saying:
Hi friends, it is a beautiful Monday here in So California. We have had spring like weather all week and it is great!
Don't you love the cute graphic above. My friend Tammy and I were talking about the old days of web homes and how we met so many nice people.
We all had webhomes where we would share about the things we liked. We left calling cards and birthday cards and shared about our lives. Tammy and I knew that we wanted to "let our light shine" along with other friends like Kacy and Pam. So much has changed over the years. But one thing doesn't change and that is our God.
James 1:17 New Century Version (NCV)
"Every good action and every perfect gift is from God. These good gifts come down from the Creator of the sun, moon, and stars, who does not change like their shifting shadows." There has been a lot of "shadows in my life" and it is the constant light of Love that keeps me going. Let the Son shine!
August 2, 2013
Today's Saying: Time to go out!
Wednesday we went to the Orange Country Fair. We try to go every year and it was nice to be there will all 3 grandkids.
They loved the kiddie rides and eating outside. Hubby and I ate a few things we normally don't get like fudge and a Pinks hotdog.
I think the thing I liked the most was the butterfly exhibit. The girls liked the butterlies but Eddie did not want one on him.
I was talking to my cousin Joanie about how time goes by. We were talking about
my dad and how he loved life and he liked to be with people. We both agreed that
it is so easy to pull back when we are feeling down or overwhelmed. Her husband
lost his uncle a couple of weeks ago and they said the same thing "I thought I had
more time." Joanie talked about how special my dad was to her and how we have to hold
onto those memories. We agreed to meet for lunch as we did on Thursday. We ate at
a place called the Blue Frog at the Orange Circle in Orange California. Though Joanie's hubby
is in a lot of pain do to neck and spine pain, We had a great
meal and we enjoyed each other's company so we plan to do it again. Today was the funeral- Celebration service for
Bob, Bobby's uncle and it was very nice service. I always love the video montages shown. There was a large showing
from the Corona Fire Department since he was a retired Fireman. Hope is knowing we will all meet in Heaven someday.
Today I read my friend Tammy's blog and she was talking about having her blog for over 10 years, just like me. We both miss the country graphics but she has moved on. I still have so many on my website of over 200 pages. I started out with Susan's Garden of Friendship. Later I got Our Family for Him. I also did a website for our women at church called WINGS-Women in God's Service. Eventually I merged them all. From my site map you can find the link to Our Family. That is where all my Vacations are listed like my 2008 trip to NY and 2005 trip to Grand Canyon and Utah. I have 3 different Hawaii trips listed also. So many pages that bring back great memories. I have 3 years of "Homework"pages when my friend Darylynn would give us topical assignment that we would write on. I had so many pages, and eventually many were merged but they are still there. I know someday I will have to close down my site. I am trying to scrap them to keep the memories alive. I want my kids to remember me. Now that both my parents are gone, I found that I have so many questions now unanswered. Time is limited and I know I need to make the most of my days. With that said, I am going to go scrap. Hugs
July 29, 2013
Today's Saying: AADD?!#D!
We have been having beautiful breezy days, and under season weather that has been so wonderful! High 70's low 80's and I have sure enjoyed it. But it will warm up for sure and our hottest months are yet to come, August -October. Meanwhile, I will enjoy it.
I started walking again and it sure feels good to be outside right now listening to my praise music on Pandora. Some of the older songs remind me of the first 10 years of church. With weather this nice, it is hard to stay inside, but I have so many things I have to do and I do have the time to do them. Problem is that I can't manage my time well to do it. I have AADD. I think I have always had ADD, but there was not a name for it back in my school days. But I do have report cards that said I needed to pay attention better. If the teacher was reading or talking, my mind would wander away, usually staring out the large windows found in older schools. ADD kids have a hard time paying attention unless there is something so interesting that holds there attention. Even then that thing is providing enough stimulus, to keep the mind from wandering. I find my mind is thinking about so many things and I do things. There is a page I made that is linked on the right so you get the humorous idea of what many of us go through.
A part of me wants to keep busy, so I don't miss my parents and get sad.
I did pretty well after my mom died, because I had my dad. When I lost him, I feel like my mind fractured.
It is hard to describe, but I am sure it is a part of grief when you have lost one that you loved
so much. I think it is why I like to play Farmville, it keeps me distracted and lets me be creative
with my farm, much in the same way of web page designing or creating spread sheets as work.
I am at a crossroad in my life and I can't control most thing that happen. But I have to stay positive
and work on the things I can do like watch what I eat and exercise. I am tryig to get involved in more
activities like the Bunco Luau I went to on Friday night. I have to stay positive and
think about my family and not get sucked under with the thought that says "what's the use."
So I will keep busy and try to be constructive. I have a busy schedule this week. Hair cut on Tuesday,
The Orange County Fair on Wednesday, lunch with friends on Thursday, fuberal on Friday and Disneyland
on Saturday. I was suppose to go to Temecula this week but I will try to go next week.
July 26, 2013
Today's Saying: Revisiting the Past!
Another week has flown by and ends with much needed rain which is a rare for So Ca. It has cooled things down a bit but added humidity which is not common either. But it was enough for me to get out in the garage and sort through things and get some things ready for donation. It's feels good to be able to get some clutter out.
I have also been cleaning up my computer. I am not trashing anything, just moving files to flash drives for backup. I am saving picture files and web graphics. I have so many graphics and since I am not using them to often, they don't need to be on my computer. My computer is running slow and I am not sure how long it will last. 5 years is a long time for a laptop. I have a Toshiba and it has done pretty well for me.
Back to pictures, I needed to find some from our September 2008 Family vacation to San Diego. I started a scrap book after the trip and got it 90% done and showed it to my parents. I want to have it done by this Septmeber when our family gets together for my dad's birthday. I know he is gone, at his last party, he told us he wanted a big 80th birthday party like his parents had. They both had mariachis and tons of food and lots of people. Well my sister wants to honor that request on a small scale by hosting a party at her house. It will be the first time everyone is over since dad died. She has been making it her own with new paint, window treatments and her pictures. Dad asked us to stay close and keep getting together.
I just went to my Blog2008 to see if I had posted any pictures from that 2008 event and there were none!
I guess I was so busy scrapping, that I did not blog. I looked at my cpanel and there is a filename called
SD 2008 but it was empty. So maybe I work on that at some point. I love making webpages but
they are mostly for me since know one does them anymore. I am a country web graphics dinosaur for sure!
I will post a link when I get it done. Meanwhile, I will enjoy revisiting the past.
Here are the cousins enjoying a waterpark playday in Temecula.
July 21, 2013
Today's Saying: Visitors welcomed!
I am still at my sister's house but I will be leaving on Monday. I am listening to a Christan music station on tv and listening to the rain falling outside. It is really unusual for us to get rain in the summer but no complaining because we sure need it. Hopefully it will help put out the fires in Riverside County Near Palm Springs.
Renee and the kids came down Friday and went swimming and had dinner. It was nice to see them and
it was a little get away for the kids. They spent the night and the next day Sergio and Cindy
took them to the movies. While they were at the movies, Renee and I went to Hobby Lobby so Renee could get
some items for Jazzy's birthday party. We had lunch and then stopped in Target. We found Cinderella shoes on sale
so now Jazzy will have the whole outfit to wear on ther birthday. When we got home the kids
were having lunch and then we all went swimming again. We made chicken soft tacos for dinner.
Renee let play while she loaded up the car. Then she put their jammis on and brushed their teet and
I walked them out.
I packed up most of my dad's clothes and Salvation Army picked them up yesterday. I kind of wished I would
have saved a pair of his shoes. My brother told us that things that never made a difference would
after his death. We found this out when we lost mom, but it has been much harder this time. I really felt sad
when I cut up cards that belonged to mom and dad because they had their names on it. I did find a box that had
ties in it. I found the tie my dad wore to my son's wedding to I am going to give it to my son.
Now that about 95%
of the clothes are gone I will concentrate on pictures and cards.
I started it last night after my
daughter and the kids left and I got a lot done.
When my daughter came on Friday, I had gotten a whole roasted chicken from Costco's. We had that with corn on the cob and salad.
We used some of the chicken on Saturday for chicken tacos. Today I cooked down the rest of the chicken and made a soup.
I added onion and celery to the pot. I cooked whole wheat noodles and set them aside. I sauteed some onion, tomatoes and spinach
just until they started to cook. When it was time to serve it, I put the noodles in my bowl first, then added the soup and topped it
with the spinach mixture. It was really good and perfect on this rainy day.
July 18, 2013
Today's Saying: Happy 60th Anniversary Mom and Dad!
My dad's parents, my parents Sam and Madeline and my mom's parents.
All were married over 55 years.
We will be celebrating 39 next month!
July 16, 2013
Today's Saying: Semi-vacation!
I am writing from my sister's house in Temecula which is about 40 minutes from my house. I am so tired and sore but in a good way.
I started an aerobics/exercise class in a pool with friends from church. I really need the exericise and it is always more fun with friends.
I gave it a lot of thought because I am not a morning person and the class starts at 9:00am. But I decided it is worth it because I need it and
I need to get on a more normal sleeping schedule. Staying up til 3 4 am and sleeping in to 11:00 am keeps me from enjoying the babies and hubby
is still an early to bed, early to rise guy. I am hoping that once I am on an earlier schedule, We can go for an early walk. It really felt good to good
to exercise and get the heart beating. I sure am sore now!
Saturday was another Disney day and hubby drove in with me so we could eat at Downtown Disney first. Andrew and Audrina
went in there car and joined us there. After eating and browsing, hubby left to to some errands and we went into the park.
Audrina's favorite ride is the Ariel ride. After spending time there we took the monorail to Disneyland. I should wear one of those meters to see
how many miles we are walking. We had dinner at Thunder Ranch and though expensive, you do get your moneys worth.
We did not get home until 10:30. We went to the late service at church and then ran a few errangs and end up at Chilis for "lundin" late lunch, early dinner.l
Like most Sunday's we took care of Eddie and Jazzy go Renee could go to her volunteer job at Kasier Hospital. They really like her there and the head floor nurse
says she will give Renee a recommendation when Renee needs it. Renee starts her college classes for medical assistant in Sept. Eddie her son starts kindergarden
in a few week and Jazzy starts preschool in Septemeber.Time sure flies.
I meant to get up early today, but my sister did not wake me. But I needed the extra sleep. I went shopping and picked up a few things and after this post I will start packing more things. I got a lot of my dad's shirts packed up yesterday. Most will go to charity. We are not in a rush to do this, because it takes time, at least for us. So each time I will come I will work on something. My sister is to busy working and so she is glad I am doing it since I promised my dad I would take care of his things. My brother is taking care of the financial, estate and that is more than enough. Plus his daughter is getting married and his son's family just moved in. My grand neice has an eye condition and her mommy has to stay home with her. She had a really good job as a speech therapist, but knows she needs to be with the baby and almost 3 year old Sammy. My brother suggested they mve in their big house and my nephew was able to sell his house quickly. I know this would make my parent's happy. Well I will end with this picture my daughter sent me.
July 8, 2013
Today's Saying: God bless America!
We had a wonderful 4th of July and getting together makes me feel good. Good to see the family staying close and knowing how it would make mom and dad happy. Dad was very patriotic and loved this holiday. It was a very special day also because my brother gathered everone together first for our prayer before eating and thanking God for our great country and the many blessings we have. Later he gathered everyone together again to share about dad and mom and their love for their family. He then presented each grandchild with a check. I know they were all overcome and blessed. Brother made me laugh because he said that dad and mom would pay for fireworks one more time and the kids loved them. Even we adults had fun twirling around sparklers.
There was so much food! My brother Scott(Samuel) smoked ribs. There was aslo bbq chicken, hot dogs, chili beans, corn on the cob, potato, macaroni and green salad. There was chips and salsa and artichoke dip and crackers. There was tons of fruit and several pies.
Scott smoking ribs, bbq was next to him.
Enjoying ourselves in the pool.
Getting ready for the fireworks!
On Tuesday the 2nd, hubby and I drove to San Clemente. We wanted to find out where the wedding will be for my neice and to look at the hotel we will be staying at. We enjoyed lunch, walked around and stopped in the Post Office and and Olive oil store. We stopped in the library and got a few kids books in the used book section. We found several level 1-2 books for Eddie. A few doors down, I found a cute Peanuts ornament in an antique store. We stopped in Casa Romantica, the home of the founder of San Clemente. Our last stop was at a coffee store that sold shabed ice. then we drove down Paficic Highway along, Dana Point, Laguna and Newport Beach. We took the ferry from Balboa Island to Balboa where we walked around. The Catalina Flyer had just arrived and we talked about how we were in Catalina in 1999 for our 25th anniversary. Time has passed so quickly, and so many changed both good and bad. Now we are approaching our 39th anniversary. We had dinner at BJ's in Balboa and notived the the Orange Julius was no longer there. Reality if life is always changing, sometimes slowly and sometimes quickly. I am not one that likes change. I am one of the last standing country web home owners. My site started around 1999. I miss the community of women I met and though many are on Facebook, it is not the same. So if I miss that, you can only imagine how much I miss my dad. My days are up and down as far as emotions and I know that anyone that has lost a parents knows what I am feeling. My dad was more than a dad. He was my friend and we were always close. I know time will heal and meanwhile, I will make new memories.
June 30, 2013
Today's Saying: Blessed!
It is hard to believe that a year ago, I was in Hawaii, getting a tattoo, saling on a catamaran, swimming with turtles,
walking in a rain forest, walking up a volcano, swimming under a waterfall, enjoying a ride in an outrigger canoe and visiting the famous historic sights in Hawaii. But the best thing was
doing these things with my hubby, dad and family. I am so glad we invited my dad to our week in Oahu before joining the rest of the family in Maui.
I still miss my dad so much, but I am not starting to look back with thankfulness and blessings instead of deep mourning. Memories will keep me going no matter how much I miss my parents. They left me and my family with lot of good memories. Hubby and I are doing the same with our kiids and grand kids.
This past week I was a leader with a group of pre schoolers at Vacation Bible School-Kingdom Rock {Stand Strong For God!}It was a long week and I was pretty tired, but it was great watching the kids enjoy the songs and lessons, games and snacks. I think the favorite part was the songs with hand motions. I bought the music cd and my grand kids are still singing and dancing. I still have lot of memories of when I went to VBS.
The week before VBS, a grouop of about 20 high schooler/college students went to a missions trip to Beliez where they put on VBS for the kids
there. They showed a video today at church and the kids came back on fire! They shared that the trip showed them how blessed we are here in the USA with all we have and yet we want more. There, the kids had so little and yet they were so happy and that is a real blessing. We are lucky that is the USA we can still experience freedom to worship and celebrate! In case I don't get back, have a wonderful 4th of July!
June 23, 2013
Today's Saying: Families times bring happiness.
It is hard to believe that a year ago I was in Hawaii with my hubby and dad. We had such a nice time and I will always be thankful that hubby was nice enough to invite my dad to go with us for the first week. You can see pictures and the link at the side column. Thursday we went to my son Daniel's company picnic at Castle Park in Riverside. We had a nice time and plan to go there again for the water park.
Today Renee and I went to a bridal shower for my neice Armida. My sister Terry joined us and we drove to Orange for the Tea Themed shower. It was a very beautiful set up and the weather was perfect. The hostesses son took pictures and I hope I get some. Dad's greatest wish was that the family would continue to get together and make more memories. There were lots of games, food and laughter and I thank God for being able to enjoy the event. The rest of the day at home was peaceful.
The Sangria and tea were really great and refreshing.
The beautiful table and we got to keep the hankie/spoon and honey jar.
The food was great! Loved the orzo shrimp salad!
Madeline, Natalie, Armida, Renee, 2nd generation of princesses.
Dad's first set of princesses. :)
Ann, Susie, Terry, Armida and her mom Cindy.
Beautiful Full Moon
Have a great week!
June 17, 2013
Today's Saying:Standing in the middle.
I guess that is a way to explain how I feel. I don't feel as bad as I have the past few months, and I know I am slowly moving forward, but I don't feel very motivated either. But that doesn't mean I don't move forward. Yesterday was Father's day and I was not sure how I
would feel. But over all it was a good weekend. Renee and Edward made plans to take the kids camping so they decided to treat Jr to Father's day a day ahead. We went to the Science Museum at Expostion Park in Los Angeles. Jr and I had not been there since the boys were little. We all had a great time but the highlight was seeing the Space Shuttle.
After we left there, we went to have dinner at Rascoe's Chicken and Waffle. We went before the dinner crowd and so we got seated right and the service was great. Jr and I shared chicken with gravy that had onions in it along with collard greens. We also had an order of buckwheat waffles and everything was great! The place was packed by the time we left. We found out a new location will be opening up in Anaheim this summer. This is the place that President Obabma visited last year. It was a long day and nice to enjoy a quiet evening while Renee and the kids were camping.
Andrew and Marina met us at church and the service was good, but I was feeling sad, missing my dad. The father's got $1.00 beverages at the coffee bar so I got hubby a skinny carmel macchiato. We talked to Pastor Jim's brother who has a terminal lung problem. He was a fireman for years and dr's think the job led to the problems he is having now. Talking to him also made me think of my dad since he was wearing an oxygen mask and ion a wheel chair. I kept remembering that my dad is celebrating Father's Day with the Eternal Father. After church we met my sister at Olive Garden for lunch on Andrew and Marina. Audrina was her happy self and talking to Aunt Terry. Jr and I both ordered the soup and salad lunch. Andrew ordered a shrimp appetizer in a lemon sauce that we all shared and it was great! After lunch Terry and I went to the cemetary to leave flowers for my dad. We also left a flag things that twirl in the wind. We sat under the huge magnolia tree and talked for awhile about how we were feeling. A year ago we were getting ready for a wedding. I did not see my dad on Father's day because we were all going to be at a wedding the next day. Terry did spend it with dad. The year before he came to my church and we went out to eat and I am glad I have that memory with a great picture of us. Terry and I left to go buy gifts for the bridal shower we are going to for out niece, our brother's youngest daugther. After the shower, my sister's and I will meet up with my brother so we can give him our checks and he can give us an update on my dad's estate.
So here it is Monday and life goes on. I am still working on organizing pictures. I found some pictures in an envelope of my dad. I had set them aside after my mom died so that I could can them for when I needed them for my dad. Sadly, I did not have the time to look when I was so busy taking care him. I am still working on his web page. I walked 2 miles today and it felt good. I need to because I have gained back 6 pounds and most of it went right back to the middle! If I could just give up FV, I would be ok. No will power yet, but thinking about it. Have a nice week.
June 11, 2013
Today's Saying: Family ties stay strong.
Like most families, we have certain activities that have become tradition. When we lived in Santa Ana, we took our kids to the Santa Ana zoo called Prentice Park. Then we moved to Corona. Jr started taking the kids there during spring break while I worked and he was on vacation. We also went as a family. Renee still liked going as a teen and one of those visit turned her into a non meat eater. Now that she has kids, she liked taking them and since we are retired, we got a membership to take the grands. When we moved to Corona in 1990, we found a Mexican restaraunt called Miguel's Sr. They are very popular now and have opened up many Miguels Jr. Friday Jr, Renee and the kids went to Citrus Park for the 40 year anniversary celebration. They handed out free burritos, chips and water. The kids got to play in the water. The Vasquez family own Miguel's and made a gernerous donation toward the construction of the waterpark. It is the same park we went kite flying a few weeks ago. I am sure we will be spending lots of time there.
Satuday was another Disney day for Andrew, Audrina and I. We tried the new Mader ride and it was a bit wild for me. Audrina likes the Monorail so after spending time in California, we took the Monorail to Disneyland. Audrina was dressed up as Snow White and like the attention she got from people saying hi to"Snow White"
Sunday we went to see our grand neice get dedicated. Avery is the one I asked for prayer a few entries ago. She has an eye condition called aniridia.
Her pupils don't work to control light and part of her retnia is underdeveloped so she will need to wear special glasses for the rest of her life. The MRI did not show any abnormalities in her brain and that is good. Scotty and Cynthis the parents remain positive and thankful. Cynthia is a speech therapist for schools but will be taking a leave off absence to be there for Avery. My brother is also Scott and my sister in law is also Cynthis but we call her Cindy. Both of the Scotts are actually Samuel's named after my dad. We are a close family and it was nice to see my two sisters and brother in law come in from Temecula for the service. I know my parents would be happy. My brother in law Ernie has completed his checmo and radiation for colon cnacer. Surgery will be in about a month. Ann and Ernie were taking a cruise to Alaska for ther 35th anniversary but will pospone it for next year. Aferwards we went to Miguel Sr for lunch. Later we saw a picture on Facebood, Marina took Andrew for his first golf practice.
I have been going through pictures and cards again, getting things organized. Then I need to develop some pictures that are on the camera and IPhone.
Yesterday I received the check from the insurance. It was bittersweet as I read the letter offering condoelnces. Our daddy is still taking care of us.
June 4, 2013
Today's Saying: Life happens and Life goes on.
It has beeb almost 4 months since my dad passed away. Time sure goes by quickly whether you are having fun or not. Regardless of how I feel, I have to remember that I have a choice to live life. One of my dad's last words was to tell me that I would be ok because I had my family. My friends have reminded me to stay strong in my faith and that is what my dad would want.
I have been keeping busy by doing some major spring cleaning and I have felt anxious at times. I would feel like I did when I was at my dad's going through all his paperwork knowing that we were working on a time frame. At least I can see where the anxiousness is coming from and not I just have to use my time to be constructive. I got a bunch of decorative boxes on sale last week and I have been using them to store what I want while I get rid of other things.
Today I walked a little over a mile while Renee ran 2 1/2. Hubby watched the grands for us. I am trying to eat better too. Renee cooked a chicken in the crock pot and we had salad, broccoli and brown rice. I have plain popcorn and cherries for snack. I have gained 6 pounds back and the tummy sure shows it. My dr actually wanted me to add a few pounds but I think I over did it. I think I was just eating to fill a void.
I do take my breaks playing on my farms or with the grands. We got them a water table and a wading pool. We also got them a picnic table. I love to see them playing and being happy. Last Friday we all went to Churck E. Cheese to celebrate the end of the school year for Eddie and we all had a fun time.
Today hubby and I went to thr Triple A and got information on DC and NY and some information on a cruise. We won't be seriously checking into it until I get my inheritance from my dad. Our target date is October 2014 for our 40th anniversary. My dad encouraged me to do this trip and he has made the way.
So thank you Lord and thank you Dad.
May 26, 2013
Today's Sayings: Happy Memoiral Day!
We have had beautiful weather the past few days. A bit cloudy in the morning but sunny the rest of the day. Thursday Renee made bbq
chicken sliders that she had found at Fresh N Easy. Earlier in the day I mailed off my insurance papers. Friday Andrew and I went to Disneyland around 1 pm and were able to get on some of the faster rides that Audrina can't get on. We waited 90 minutes for Cars Land but it was worth it. We also went on Soaring Over California. It makes you think you are in a glider going over the key sights of California like the San Francisco bridge and Yosemite. Then we headed to Disneyland and got on Star Tours. We took the Monorail to Downtown Disney for dinner. We took the Monorail back to Tomorrowland and rode the Bobsleds at the Matterhorn. That was a 55 minute wait. We did not want a 2 hour wait for Space Mountain but we did get to walk right in to Captain EO with Michael Jackson and Angelica Houston. Weran into my nephew and his wife and kids and joined them at Pirated of the Carribean. There was a bunch of teens behind us and they were a bit mouthy. Several high schools were there celebrating Grad night. I guess Disney figured if they kept the park open for grads, they might as well open it up to the public. So Disney would be ope for 24 hours. After Pirates we decided to try the Haunted Mansion to see if Audrina could go on it. We decided it was not good for her. At dinner we had checked the movies at Downtown Disney and decided to we would catch a move so we headed back and saw Star Trek. The movie was great! I use to watch the original series back in the 60's. My favorite ride Star Tours and then Star Trek which was great! I would see it again for sure. After the movie we decided we did not want to go back to the park. Since we have annual passes, there was no reason to have to stay up all night.
I slept in on Saturday and then joined hubby for his ride to the Post Office to pick up his incentive check. We stopped at Costco's so he could get some goodies to take in. His incentive to retire was for $10,000 and after taxes and other things he got just under $7000! Well it was better than nothing that I got to retire, but I am still glad I did when I did. He is putting his money
away and acting like he did not get it. Later we went to Andrew's for a bbq. It was a nice relaxing time and the food was great. Daniel spent the whole day with his girlfriend at Huntingon Beach.
BBQ pork and chicken, beans, rice, asparagus,salad and fruit.
That is pineapple on my plate, not butter.
Today we went to church and then to Lowes to get things to fix up the yard. We had lunch at Chilis. I had grilled chicken salad and hubby had the grilled tilapia with mango salsa and a side of mushrooms that he poured over his fish. All of it was great and enough for dinner too. Then we went to Toys R Us and bought a water table for the grands. They days are getting better were I don't think about my dad all day, but at times I get a panicky feeling when I realize he is gone. One day at a time. Meanwhile, I will keep busy around the house. I am eating more healthy, but I need to cut back on the snacks. Need to walk more too. Enjoy the rest of the week. Hugs
Can you name all of them?
May 22, 2013
Today's Sayings: Moving forward...
The days are moving faster than I want them too. Last week we took the grands to the Prentice Park Zoo again. Renee took one car with the girls and we took our car. The girls were happy to be there and we had a nice time. Eddie was a school and we will go back after he ends his school year. After we left the park, Hubby and I headed to Huntington Beach to have lunch. Last year when we were in Hawaii, we had planned to go to eat at Dukes in Waikiki. But dad had gotten sick the night before we were going to go and so we didn't make it. We decided to we would go to Dukes and enjoy a lunch. We got a window seat with a great view. After lunch we walked on the pier. Another reason we were in the area was to pick up our "grand doggie Pepper's remains from the pet hospital. Andrew was not able to go. Just the thought saddened him and since he carpools, it would have been hard so we offered. Hubby went in and came out with a pretty see through cloth bag and handed it to me. I looked at the little box and started crying. It made me think of how special she was and how in 3 years I had lost 2 pets and my parents. Then I remembered how I was blessed by a Willow Tree Angel from my friend Darylynn. It was so special and I placed it by my Reina's box. Jr remembered a Hallmark store nearby and we went there and we found the perfect figurine. I found the one like I had received and Jr. pointed out another one. The "boy angel" was sitting down holding a black dog and I knew that would be perfect since Marina loves Willow Tree. I looked at it and imagined my dad holding Pepper. After leaving there we went cruising my home town in Santa Ana. We drove by the houses I lived at from 1960-74. We drove by my grandma's old house and then we headed to the cemetary. Then we went to old town Orange and had dinner at a Mexican restaurant that was in a converted church. We shared a meal and talked about our one day vacation and how we want to do this about once a week.
Saturday was my son Daniel's company picnic and we had a nice time. Andrew and Marina could not go because Audrina was sick. Edward and Renee got there first and Daniel and his girlfriend were there too. There were burgers and hot dogs/brauts too. Lots of fruit, salad and chips. Mel brought a bean bag board game and we brought kites. The weather was perfect and just enough wind. The kids had a great time and so did we. I sent my brother a piture of Eddie flying the kite since my brother had bought it in 2008 when our whole family had gone to San Diego for a few days. Brother said that what we did madke dad happy. Even Eddie said the kite was waving to Papa Sam.
A little over a week ago I got a large envelope in the mail from dad's federal group life insurance company. I opened it up and the letter offered it's condolences for the loss of my loved one. The policy said there was no designated beneficiary and since there was no spouse, it went to his children. You would think I would be happy to get some money, but I kind of through it aside and said I wanted my dad, not the money. It sat on the table a few days and I looked at it again and then felt sad and set it aside again. My sister called me on Thursday while we were at the zoo with the grands and I answered her questions about the form. She felt the way that I did. Part of dad's will states that each grand child will get a set amount from this insurance policy and so it has to be done.
Today I gave Andrew the bag today and he took it home. Later Marina posted a thank you and how blessed they were to get the angel. Love always pays forward. I made a healthy meal of salmon and veggies and we watched the final showing of Dances With the Stars. I a glad Kelly Pickler won.
Afterwards I finished the insurance paperwork and tomorrow I will make a copy and mail it off. Another step in moving foward and I know dad would be happy.
Angel of Friendship
Angel of Comfort
May 17, 2013
Today's Sayings: Lost post...
I updated my blog with a long post on the 15th forgetting my server was updating or moving. So in the move, the last post was deleted or not saved. Normally I type it our on a text docuemnt that I save. I wrote all about the tea and had a few pictues to share. Since I am limited on time today, I am going to make a bullet type entry.
The Tea:
Setting the table the night before was very helpful.
The decorations were amazing!
The tea was advertised as not your mother's tea,
but the food was very traditional.
The only complaint at my table was the food, not enough
and they did not care for the tea sandwiches.
I had a lot of compliments on my table setting.
My centerpiece was a hit, and women could still see each other.
Many of the other centerpieces were amazing and really reflected
the theme, but women could not see each other.
My daughter and I wore my mom's hats and so did some of
the other women on my table.
Renee baked cookies and cupcakes for my table.
Each women got to take home a rose in a candle cup.
I used 4 of my 6 teapots and most of my teacups.
I am making a web page on this tea.
Mother's Day:
Saturday before, Renee treated me to Red Lobster
This was after her and Marina got tatoos in Temeucla
The place was called Devoted Ink and Christian music
was playing that was calming to the girls.
Saturday evening Daniel got me Subway and we watched
Remember the Titans
Sunday morning Renee, Edward made me breakfast and Jr
and the grand kids brough it to me.
Church was really nice and Andrew and Marina treated us to Friday's
May 9, 2013
Today's Sayings: Time for Tea...
Hi friends, I got a lot done in spite of waking up so late and feeling a little blue. My dad has been in heaven 3 months now. Seems like a long time. Time just goes by to fast. In a way that is good but in another way it is not. Life happens and life goes on. This week I got the rest of the things I needed for my table for the tea. Now to decide what I am going to wear. I did find a dress while we were shopping, but have decided to wear that to my neice's wedding in August. I have this black dress with roses on it that I am going to wear with one of my mom's hats. I need to add a rose pin that was my mom's too. The theme this year is Mad Hatter and all women are encouraged to wear a hat. There will be prizes for the most decorated hat but I am not worried about a prize. It was hard for me to think outside the box of a traditional tea but I am pleased with what I have come up with. I am really pleased that my daughter is helping me and will baking for my tables centerpiece. The sign up table at church had the Alice in wonderland tea set and it
is really cute, but I am sure it cost a pretty penny. I added a few things to keep with the theme of Alice in Wonderland. I have an old fashion clock that was my dad's. I made my napkin rings holders by adding a clock and antique key to a ribbon. I am using my mom's white plates that are now Renee's along with some of my pansy plates since flowers were in the movie. I also am using 3 teapots that I have and mixed teacups that I have collected over the years.
So this is me thinking off the wall with mixing things. I found some hot pink charger plates that make the colors pop. I like to have tea cozys and was able to use the child's tea cups and plates that I found at Ross when I went shopping with my girfriends. This makes it more whimsical. I will take lots of pictures and make a page for it. I already got the graphics ready too. Thursday I will color my hair and then Renee and I will go set up our table.
I spent time working in the garage too. A charity truck will be buy next week so I want to put some things out. We also have a man coming next week to do some work in the garage so it has been a good opportunity to get some things out of the garage.
I am still playing Farmville and the latest farm in Australia so hats off to my friend Julie of Bear Essential Graphics. She really blessed me with pray and words of encouragement while my dad was dying and afterwards too. We also play Word with Friends. When I would visit my dad on the weekend, we would both be in bed watching tv and I would play my FV and I would point things out to him. He use to laugh at me because he could she how my "perfectionsism" would come out on my farm. When my dad was sick, he would have me check his email and Facebook for him. I was able to meet some of his friends. One friend is Janet that he worked with at HUD. We are now FV friends too and she shared some cool things about my dad. Well I better get going now. I have to put my tablecloth and napkins in the dryer before going to bed.
One more thing, baby Avery's MRI came back normal! I will visit her next week and learn more. Thanks for the prayers!
The little mouse is actually from Cinderella, an old McD's toy.
May 5, 2013
Today's Sayings: God Talking...
I am going to try to blog more often for a number of reasons. Life goes by to fast but my mind doesn't and I enjoy my blog and reading past events too. I did not have to serve at jury duty this time around. It worked out great for me. Thursday evening I went to a special service at church where the guest speaker Pastor Robert Maasbach of England was praying for people. I heard him say prayers about people that were right on target. People he has never met and yet the message was unique to them. It was an awesome ngiht. It made me think of a song by Mandisa called God Speaking. Mandisa was an American Idol finalist in 2006 and we saw the tour also. Mandisa started by giving praise to God and the crowd at the Pond went wild. Cahterine McPhee was the runner up and she on on the new program called Smash.
Ok so I am rambling a bit but it is late after a busy weekend. :) I went to bed late Thrusday and woke up at 5am on Friday. Hubby and I went out to breakfast and I spent the rest of the day getting ready for my weekend getaway. My cousin Joanie picked me up at 5:30 along with my friend Olivia and we were off to Costa Mesa which is before Newport Beach. Joanie's daughter has a little cottage house and she let us stay in it while she was away on business. We had a great weekend of eating, shopping and enjoying girl time. Saturday morning we headed to the OC
Orange County Fairgrounds for the swap meet. Turns out the OC marathon was that morning so we left. I told them about a place nearby called Debra's Cottage that was having a Mother's Day Event and we end up spending 2 hours there. I found a plate that I needed for my centerpiece for the tea. We all found things we needed and every mother got a rose. We shopped at Ross and then we headed to Hanks for dinner. We stayed up until 4 am and slept in. Just a grown up or should I say middle aged women sumber party. We slept in late and had breakfast while watching our church service online. We talked about the things that had happened to use over the past 20 years and reflected on examples of when we knew God was talking to us. We showerd, and cleaned up the cottage and then left. We put our roses in a vase and left them for Joy to enjoy along with a lemon scented Yankee candle as a thank you for her hospitality. We shopped at Home Goods/Marshalls and found more goodies. We stopped for dinner at a fish taco place before going home. Hubby had the grankids sitting by them while watching Beauty and the Beast when I got home. Renee was at her volunteer job at Kaiser hospital. It was a great weekend! Have a great week. Hugs
Oh and here is the song GOD SPEAKING
May 1, 2013
Today's Sayings: Lord I am waiting...
When I was taking care of my dad, I was using his car and he had his car radio set to The Message that played
Christian music. I spent a lot of time crying in the car. The music touched me and I needed to cry so I would not cry in front
of my dad because I was trying to be strong. I shared some of the songs here on my blog or on Facebook. When I worked, I would listen
to my Christian radio and sometimes my roomie listend and other times I would put on my head phones so she could listen to her music.
Other times we would listen to oldies or whatever. Since I have been home and I am parked in front of the tv while on the computer,
I watch a lot of tv. I realize that I have really missed my Christan music. At times it is hard because certain songs make me think
of my dad and then I cry. The gut wrencing anxious feeling I was feeling at the loss of my dad is dimishing, but I still miss him
so much. I realized I need draw more on my faith and move on since I know it is what God wants and what my dad would want. Faith is knowing
where he is and that I will be with him soon. So I will wait until I get to heaven and move on. I am getting back to church on a regular
basis and getting invovled.
I am on call for jury duty this week and I have checked each evening but I am on hold so far. Maybe I won't have to serve. I don't mind it
I have to, but I hate to wake up early. So I am waiting...
I had a great time with my friends last week and I am going away this weekened too. I am doing a separate page on my Carpenteria.
Though I was reluctant to go, I am glad I did.
get away.
My son bought a new truck on Monday and today we loaded up the babies and went out to pizza. They were really excited to be in
a high truck that held them, uncle, Mema and Ampa. It was a nice outing. After we ate we went to Wal-Mart go get a few things. I bought
each girl a little purse. I will get something for Eddie later. Now I am listening to Mandisa, one of my favorite singers who got
popular on American Idol. I plan to read her book again. I need to take some pictures off my IPhone and make room for her music. So
many things to do but playing FarmVille keeps me busy. Just when I think I need to quit, they come up with a new Theme and now it is
Austrailia. Well good day-night mates.
I'm waiting I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait
I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting I will serve You
While I'm waiting I will worship
While I'm waiting I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord
JOHN WALLER-While I'm Waiting-Click on title above to hear the song.
April 20, 2013
Today's Sayings: Springing into Vacation...
Spring is here for us now. Hubby is planting in the yard. Daniel went camping last weekend at Lake Castaic with some friends. Edward got Renee tickets to the San Diego zoo and they went on her birthday. Our church is having a spring tea and it is a Mad Hatter Theme. I have been in charge and hosted many teas in the past, all of which have been traditional teas using sets of China I have. Now I have to think outside the box and hostesses will be judged on the centerpice of the table. There will also be a contest for decorated hats. I will get more information after church on Sunday. Hubby and I went to a Goodwill store and we found the Disney's Alice in Wonderland VHS for $1.00 and the kids watched it today. I also got a cake rack and plate for about $1.50 since everything was on sale. I colored my hair on Thursday and later the family went to Bubba Jacks for Renee's birthday. The food was good and the atmosphere was nice. Today I went to the mall and had a pedicure and wax. The place was so busy and another reminder that spring is here and woman are getting reading for flipflops and sandals. I am going camping with a few friends this week. We leave Sunday after church and will be staying in an RV at Carpenteria State beach. We did this about 10 years ago and had a good time. Now that I am retired, I can up and go! I didn't want to at first, because I was feeling so blue I didn't want to. But my dear friend Cynthia said I needed to get out and she is right. I told her I was not sleeping well and she said she would let me sleep in. We will be 12 miles from Santa Barbara so we plan to go shopping and mabye take in a movie like last time. I tried looking for a pair of shorts at the mall. I needed a size 4 and tried a few on but I can't get use to the low cut. I didn't want to spend a lot of money either so I left. Then I remembered another Goodwill store and since I was still looking for teaplates, I stopped in. No luch with plates but I did find a pair of shorts and shirt for $8.00! Saturday I will be washing and packing.
I do have another prayer request. My brother's 6 week old grand daughter Avery has a problem with her eyes. Cynthia her mom noticed something was off and told the ped dr and he checked and then agreeed and sent her to an eye doctor. That doctor has ordered an MRI for baby Avery because he says she looks like she may have a tumor. I was so sad to hear this. I feel so bad for my brother and the family. Avery was born the day after we burried my dad. My brother has been through so much and is taking care of dad's estate too. He is asking for prayer. I know it has to be hard. Things are getting a little easier for me, but I do have my moments that I just need to cry because I miss my dad.
My dad was a great example of not giving up, and he said to enjoy my retirement!
Daniel and Mel
San Diego Zoo fun. Eddie loved the elephants!
April 15, 2013
Today's Sayings: Goodbye Pepper and
Happy Birthday Renee!
and my Mother in law- Movita.
I am writing this while watching the news about the exposions at the Boston Marathon.
It is so sad and it looks like another terroist attack. Boston was one of our cruise stops
with my parents in 2008. My prayers go out to the city and people there.
Tomorrow is Renee's birthday and Edward bought tickets to the San Diego Zoo. So they will leave in the
morning and Hubby and I will watch Audrina. We visited Movita today for her birthday.
Happy Birthday Great Grandma Movita!
I went to Temecula on Friday and did some shopping at Hobby Lobby and then my sister and
I met at Olive Garden for dinner. I did not take my laptop since I was going to use my dad's lap
top one more time. I wanted to back up files to a flash drive. Saturday was the last dispersion
of my dads personal items so my brother, sisters and I were all there.
Before it started, I got
a text from my son saying he was at the vet again and my husband was there too. Pepper my grand doxie was
really sick with pneumonia and high fever. Andrew noticed she was not feeling well on Friday evening.
He and my hubby were suppose to come to Tememcula to pick items of clothing from my dad. I am so
glad my hubby was there. Andrew had recently spent over $7000 on back surgery and other visits and
treatments. The vet that was on call said that they could treat her for the pnumonia but suspected
there was something else affecting her but blood test and overnight stay would be necessary. The dr
had recently lost one of her doxies and so she was going over the options. Andrew was texting me.
The dr left so that Andrew and Jr could talk. I told Andrew I would support whatever decision he
would make. His wife told him the same thing. With a heavy heart, he decided to let her go. At first he
wanted to leave but I told him he needed to be there with her and my husband did too. So Andrew held her
and talked to her while my husband held him. I cry as I write this because I loved her too. I know the
pain of having to say goodbye. I am so glad my husband was there. Pepper is with Reina and family now.
She can run freely now. I like to imagine my parents are there too. Even my pastor believes that we are
reunited with our furbabies.
Goodbye dear Pepper.
Meanwhile, we were choosing items and drawing names for the order. I got several things I wanted like
my dad's briefcase, and stationary box. I got some pictures and dad's cell phone, camera and a wall clock.
I got some desk lamps and a few other things. My brother chose dad's laptop and I told him
the desktop was cleaned but all everything filed. Then we left for lunch at one of my dad's favorite
restraunts= Carnita's Express. We toasted to dad and then we talked about Ernie's chemo and new diet.
My brother wanted to know all about a colonocscopy since his Dr had ordered one for him.
When we got back we went through dad's clothes and took items for our boys. We loaded up our items and my brother gave me the laptop! He chose it for me.
I was speechless. It is not the best computer, but it was my dad's. After he left I stayed
to move clothes from one closet to another so my sister would not have to do it. The boys also got pen sets.
I stopped by Andrew's house to talk to Marina and Andrew. On Sunday morning, Andrew called and said he wanted to
go to Disneyland for breakfast and take his mind off Pepper. We had a nice day and then dinner at Olive Garden.
Evening was hard for me. The loss was brining up the pain of losing my Reina, my parents and now Pepper Pot.
I know time will heal but for now please keep us in your thoughts and prayers.
April 11, 2013
Today's Sayings: Springfun and Spring Cleaning!
My dad went to heaven 3 months ago on the 8th. I think I am starting to accept it.
The extreme grief is easing up now. There is something so final when you have lost both
parents because for me it opened my eyes up to several things. When both my parents got
sick, I became both the little girl and the caretaker/parent. For as long as I can remember,
I called them dad and mom. But when they got sick, I called them daddy and mama. I am not sure
why, but I think for me it was realizing how much I loved my parents and I was always there
little girl. Several times I have thought of the night when I told my dad I did not know
how I was going to live without him. He told me I had my family and he was going to a better place.
He is in heaven where there is no time to watch, no days to measure. There is just peace and joy.
My parents are fine and I have to make the most of my times here with my loved ones. I need to
make time to enjoy life. I have to take care of myself so I can be around for my family.
That being said, this is what I have been up to.
3 visits to Disneyland.
Easter egg hunt with the grand kids.
Lunch with my friends
Visit with my Aunt-sister to my dad.
Visit to the Santa Ana Zoo with the grand kids,
Family birthday party.
We have been busy around the house. Hubby is working in the yard and I am going through boxes
in the garage. Renee will have a garge sale and then what is left will go to Salvation Army.
There is just so much stuff! My kids collections, and my stamp collecting stuff from when I
taught it at my son's school. I will keep some thing for my grandkids. I finally stopped when I tripped
and scraped my arm and banged my side. Luckily I landed on old carpet. Needless to say, it called
for a Motrin and a long bath. I got to do some reading too and that was very relaxing.
Easter Egg hunt at church.
The girls love to get dressed up!
I could not decide what to wear because I was cold.
I sure look like a granny here!
A visit to the Santa Ana Zoo
Eddie was on an elephant, his favortie animal.
Jazzy on her favorite-Giraffe.
Audrina on her favorite-Panda!
My friends celebrating another birthday.
Seems like yesterday when we were all in our mid 30's
Friends for over 20 years!
March 27, 2013
Today's Sayings: Happy Easter!
Spring is here and it means new life. The humming bird we had last year is back nesting again. I am not sure if it is the mother or baby. Our front yard tree is turning green and the birds are very active. I have not been out much, just have not been in the mood. But I have been thinking a lot and keeping busy. I have been going through old bills and organizing and throwing things out. I read a book in 2 days because it was so intriguing. I got it from a group of books my dad had recently purchased. Both my parents were avid readers as I was until the advent of Facebook. I was thinking about all the books we gave mom her last few years before we knew she had Alzheiemers. I shared a few of my books with my dad and we would discuss him. My dad gave me one of his Bibles because it was the book he read the most his last few years. So back to thinking... I need to make some changes. I know I am still mourning and some moments are so painful to realize my dad is not here. But I know that dad would not like me to stay sad. I know I need to get on with my life.
I was thinking that this would be my first Easter season without my parents. Easter was always such a special time when I was growing up. We got new clothes and cool Easter baskets and the church always had an Easter picnic. Easter 1967 and 1971.
So I will hold on to the special memories. I will think about how we celebrate Easter once a year and my parents and loved ones get to live it every day!
Jesus is the reason for all seasons! Happy Easter!
March 18, 2013
Today's Sayings: Happy Birthday Marina!
finding the paper trail.
Today is my daughter in laws 30th birthday and she celerated all this past week.
She went to the Alica Keys Concert on Tuesday with her mom and friends. Saturday she had a Zumba class and then later a birthday party with family and friends. Here are some pictures to enjoy and then below another long post.
Andrew and Audrina with yogurt and fruit parfaits.
The cake Daniel made with strawberry filling and the sides
covered with white and chocolate shavings.
Renee made cakepops with 3 flavors, chocloate, red velvet
and fruity. There are black sugar sprinkes and black bows.
Hubby made a seafood cocktail that was great! I helped. :)
It is hard to believe that my dad has been gone 5 weeks. I think about him all the time
and it hurts a lot because I miss him so much. I know there are stages in grief. I use to
think they went in a certain order. But my sister is a counselor and she knows that the stages
can vary day to day, week to week. The anger stage seems to come up a lot because I want to
blame someone. I want to know why he did not tell us he was sick. I want to blame the drs for
not taking care of him better. I want to know if my dad really understood how sick he was
or did he choose not to believe. But I know there are no answers now. There is nothing sadder
than watching someone you love die. I know that God gave us strength to take care of him. I am not angry with God,
because He is the one I turn to for comfort and strength. I know that what I am feeling is normal.
I just got a really nice card from my aunt and uncle in Oregon. They saw my dad in Decemeber.
Their card said, "The one who looked out for you in the beginning, needed you the most in the end...
You were there with your tender heart and your steadfast loyalty, doing the right thing exactly
the way he would have hoped, exactly the way he taught you to do." I am so thankful for being with him as much
as I could and especially his last few weeks. I am thankful that I was with him to the end.
My brother said something at my dad's memorial service. "We have a choice, to......" He said a number of things,
but basically for me it means that I can stay in the depressed state or move forward with life." It is the same
thing I told my dad when we lost mom. It is okay to feel sad, because it is a normal part of grief, but we have
to remember the things in life that are still there. My family will get together for my great nephews 5th birthday in April. Thank goodness for the grandbabies.I get to see them every day but I am glad I am not taking care of Audrina. She is really in here "terrible two's now. My sleeping schedule is all messed up. I have been busy around the house but then I take long breaks to play Farmville!
I am here in Temecula for a few days because my brother needs me to go through my dad's paperwork
for tax and estate expense items. I will work work on his files and help my sister go through some of my
dads clothing items that can be given away. I stopped by Trader Joes to get some items to make a lentil stew for all of us. My sister Ann
says her hubby needs to eat more chicken and plant base protien. I will be back on Thursday because I have
my physical, pap and mamo on Friday. I have had some tenderness in the lymph area on the left side of my breast and I am going
to bring it up to my dr.
Love you daddy- gramps-Papa Sam- Sammy-Sam
March 5, 2013
Today's Sayings: Peace, Pain, Congratulations and Prayers!
Long post ahead.
Saturday was my dad's memorial service and it was really nice. We had a table set up with pictures and momentos,
but I forgot to take a picture of it. I was busy greeting family and friends. All of dad's family were given long stem roses,
and beginning with my family, we walked in and laid the roses on the table in front of my dad's picture.
My brother is the baby in the family, so his family was the last to come him and then my brother went up to the podium to
officiate the service. He did the same for my mom. After welcoming everyone, the montage was shown. The montage was about
20 minutes long. I had started this when dad first got sick. I had scanned some back when I did my parents 55th montage and
my mom's montage. I spent hours scanning pictures. Dad had asked how things were going while I was there and he was pleased.
I had a week to finish it after dad passed. I gave it to my brother and he added some pictures, changed a few things and
music was added and then turned into a dvd. It was beautiful and I am making a tribute page with some of those pictures.
My cousin Mark flew down from Northern
California to sing for my dad who had requested him to sing Amazing Grace. He also sang for my mom's service.
Betty, who was my mom's brides maid played the piano again too. My dad had
inquired about having something from the Navy for serving 6 years in the reserves. My brother was able to get a
Naval Color Guard and it was very touching. I really had to fight the tears, but they were hard to hold when they
presented the folded flag to my brother. My nephew Sergio read parts of the biography he wrote for my dad. My son Andrew
read a poem about being in heaven. I found the poem in the box of items he had saved from my mom's service.
We had an open share time and my dad's former boss shared how dad was able to work with HUD-DC to bring low income
housing projects for the senior citizens in the community. He did many things for the community and he and mom
hosted many fundraisers including the current governor Jerry Brown which they met. My husband and son went up and shared
and Daniel was wearing the hat my dad had given him. I wasn't sure if I could speak, but I did because I wanted to
thank all his classmates that had attended, many friend from Jr High and High School. I asked them to stand up
and there were so many. My dad had just gone to his 60th reunion this past Septemeber and had always been a part
of the reunion committies. A reception was held afterwards with food that my dad had enjoyed, sandwiches, chips,
salads, fruit, appetizers, candy and popcorn. We would normally have Mexican food like we did for my mom, but these
were dad's favorites and he could not have them when he first got sick and then asked for them the last couple of
weeks when Hospice said he could have what he wanted. After the service, some family went over to my brother's house
for coffee and desert.
I slept a lot on Sunday because I was so physically and emotionally exhausted and because I was
feeling a bit down knowing that Monday was the burial. It was for immediate family and it was very nice.
We went to my brothers for lunch. My sister Ann and her family went home because my brother in law
had a dr appointment. It was also my nephew's birthday so I figured they would go out and celebrate since my other
nephew was down from NY. Before we left my brother gave us a picture of dad and gave us each one of the rose displays.
Then he told Terry and I that we needed to pray. Our sister Ann's husband had just been diagnosed with colon cancer.
I was so sad. I chatted with my siter Ann later. I feel so bad for my sister and her family. Please keep Ernie in prayer.
We did have great news today, my brother became a grandfather to Avery Brielle. She was due on the 26th but waited until today which was so good
so the family could all be together for Dad's service and burial.
I think about my dad during the day because so many things make me think of him.
I miss him so much and at times I wonder how I can live without him. I remember telling him this a few days before he passed
and how much I loved him. He said I had my family and I would be okay and he was going to a better place and he would
see my again. I know time will heal, but
it sure is hard for now. I can only imagine what my sister is feeling with her husband having
cancer. I told Jr he has to have his test. My Dr's nurse called today to say I needed my pap and
physical and why I had not started my cholesterol medicine. I told her what was going on and
then I got an email message from my dr. She says I have to lower my bad cholesterol because of
my family history of heart disease. After seeing my dad die of liver failure, I am afraid to take
cholesterol medicine. I am going to start eating oatmeal again and start walking again. Please keep our family in prayer.
Ernie is the one in the middle top row.
February 24, 2013
Today's Sayings: I miss my dad.
I just got home this Thursday and it was great to be home. My family had ballons waiting for me that said welcome back. I was gone for more than 6 weeks. Ny son Daniel made a special dinner and the whole family ate together. I came home to furniture and boxws everywhere. While I was with my dad, my sister moved in which meant all my dad's furnishings were moved out to family members. There are still a few thingst here along with his clothing. I am wearing one of his bathrobes as I speak. I started wearing it back in December and I named it the moses robe. Dad laughted and said I could
have it knowing I also had his mama's robe too. So little by little I will get furniture moved around, boxes unpacked and home organized.
I have tried to come here and blog a few times, but I have either been too busy or just felt like I had no strength. I know I miss my dad so much and the pain of loss is so strong at times. I know time will heal and I have go get back to a more normal routine. It is almost 5am and I have been up for about 2 hours now. Not sure if it was the wind that woke me up or just thinking about my dad and his memorial that is coming up. I had no problem talking at my mom's service. But just the thought of speaking at my dad's brings me to tears. I went back on my anti depressants when I found out
my dad was terminal. I new it would be rough emotionally and though the pills help me to stay pretty calm, my body still knows the stress I have been under. I have lost near 10 pounds now and I know some of it is muscle. I feel bones now that I had not felt before because there is no padding. I hope to
get into walking and weight lifting or pilates after my dad's service. I plan to make my appointment for my physical too. I am eating, though not as much
as before.
My sister Terry is a family counselor and her boss gave her a book called Tear Soup. We read it to each other while I was still with her.
The end of the book gave great advise on dealing with grief. We all grieve in our own way and in our own time. Though my heart aches, I am still blessed
with my family and friends and my faith in God. I leave you with a song that gives me encouragement. Click on the title to see the video.
I will call on Your name
For there's always a way
When You lead me
And when life knocks me down
I am not counted out
For You're with me
And You're with me
Chorus:
Even when it feels like the light is fading
And I've lost my way
Still I'm holding on to the One who's making
All things possible
Even when it feels like my heart is breaking
Hold on, there is strength
Knowing I belong to the One who's making
All things possible
I know mountains can move
I've seen what You can do
In my weakness
So my heart will believe
If I wait I will see
My God doing, what only He can do
Bridge:
My God is strong and mighty
My God is faithful
My hope is in the Lord
For He is able
Mark Schultz
from the album All Things Possible
February 13, 2013
Today's Sayings:
My daddy Sam Sandoval is in heaven now.
Sept. 22, 1933-Feb. 8, 2012
I am still here with my sister at her new home. Dad put her on the deed when he found out how sick
he was. It is hard to believe he is gone now. I am so glad I was able to come here and be with him once he found out he only
had a few weeks left. I am so glad for all the time I was able to visit him as much as I did and I will treasure my memories.
Dad was smart to have all his affairs in order leaving my brother in charge. I went with my sibling to Fairhaven Cemetary to make
the final arrangements. It does not seem that long ago that I was going with him to make my mom's arrangements.
When I was working on my mom's montage, my dad would talk about his. I had already made a file with pictures for him.
I scanned a lot of pictures and was even able to show dad most of his montage before he passed. I was in the room with my dad when
he passed. At one point I sat near him and felt his heart beating hard and based on his breathing, I knew the time was getting closer.
He was not in pain and while I was on the phone he must have stopped breathing. I said "daddy, you quietly slipped out on us."
My sister was in the bathroom going over his medications. My brother was out in the garage starting his "burial box". He made one for my mom too. I guess the technical term would be urn but I see that more as a metal vase. My younger sister was at her house just a few blocks away. Just a few days prior, the social worker had told us that he would go his way and it could be without us there. I think God was shielding us from the last breadth.
Now that I am through with my part of the montage, I will be working on a tribute page for him. His memorial service will be Saturday March 2, at Calvary Chapel Costa Mesa. Thanks for the continued prayers.
Jan 31, 2012
Today's Sayings: Prayers needed and congrats too.
It is 2:30 am and I am in the room with my dad. He had a good few days, but
today he was more tired. I told him it was nice and sunny and so he asked to
go outside. My nephew Michael, wheeled to the backyard and we enjoyed the warmth
of the sun. My dad was quiet which is not like my dad. I asked him what he was thinking
and he said that though he knew he was going to heaven, there was so much more he wanted to do.
It doesn't matter how we age, our mind wants to stay young. I remember my grandma telling me it was
hell having a 35 year old mnd living in an old body. She lived until she was 87 and died of a stroke.
That was my dad's mom. So that is why we were really surprised when my dad got sick. He was asleep earlier and then
woke up and started talking about his funeral service. One thing he has said over and over is that he wants a flag
at his service. He served 6 years in the Naval reserves but could not go active duty because he had kids. I have been going through tons of paperwork and pictures and I have learned more about my dad's accomplishments that have really made me more proud of him. I have always been close to my dad and am grateful for the last few years that we have spent together through mom's illness and afterwards. I can go back and read my blog to remember all the
times we have spent together.
I am not sure when I will be back here. I will be doing a memorial page for my dad.
Now to congratulate my husband as he ends his Postal Career today and begins a new phase in his life. I am so grateful for his understanding
and support over the last few weeks. I felt so much love for him and he helped my dad shower and shave this past Sunday. Then he went out and bought
some breakfast from my dad's favortie place. Another amazing thing is all the visitors my dad has had. Two friends came by on Tuesday and my dad was happy. He has known them since Jr High. Everyone is so shocked to find how sick he is when dad was the one that always so fit looking.
Please keep our family in prayer. I have lost more weight and I can see how I have aged these past couple of months. But regardless, I promised my
dad I would be with him through the end.
Jan 21, 2012
Today's Sayings: Dad always wanted me to be a nurse or dr....
Yes I am nurse Susan and sometimes even "Nurse Kratchit" I check his blood and give him medicine.
I prepare and serve mills, adjust the bed, and many more things. I do it because I love my dad.
He had a rough night with cough that would not stop. I stayed on my computer until 3 and got to
sleep from 4-7. Dad wanted to be woken up to watch the President get sworn in. He has always been very patriotic
and has a good political understanding. He was a Director for HUD for many years and went to Washington DC
to meet with the Secretary of Housing Urban Developement. He went to the White House a few times and was there at the end
of his Panama trip in 2010.
The health nurse came in and she helped dad wash and dress. She is nice and will also change sheets and help him
shower and shave too. He likes to have lotion put on. We do this in the evening. The regular nurse came in too.
Dad was consdiering getting off Hospice to get fluid removed
from his lung. But he decided to try in increase in the diruertics first. If he goes off hospice,
he can goto emergency and then after being treated, he can go back on hospice again.
On Saturday, all the grandkids came and got to select items that belonged to mom and dad. Dad drew names out of a hat
and each person got to pick something. Food was brought in for lunch. Dad got to visit with the families in the morning and slept
most of the time. Everyone knows that we take things day to day. Some of the great grands are a bit afraid since
they are able to recognize that there Papa Sam is not himself. My grandson Eddie has already asked if Papa Sam is gong to heaven with
Nana and Reina. Reina is was my doxie who died Dec of 2009. Mom passed in May of 2010.
I have lost about 7 pounds but I had the weight in my middle to lose. My blood test al came back good excpet for my cholesterol.
I have to go back on pills. I don't want to because they cause a lot of muscle and joint pain. But with my dad's heart history,
I am at risk for heart problems. Dad had a tripple bipass in 2001. My grandma had heart problems and diet of a stroke. But cholesterol medicine is hard on the liver. Such a dilema! I really could use a nap.I was going to but My dad's sister and her hubby visited too and that made my dad happy, but also tired him out. My nephew is usually here until 5:30 but had toleave early. My youger sister will be here around 4:30 and then I am going to nap.
I do appreciate the continued prayers for my dad and our family.
Jan 15, 2012
Today's Sayings: Happy Birthday to my son Andrew
Prayers needed please.
Hi Friends, it is 6:30 am and I have been up for an hour.It read 25 degrees outside as we have had artic air coming down from Alaska.
I was up until 1am scanning pictures for dad's montage.
Last Monday the dr told us that dad needed to start Hospice because there was nothing more that could
be done with end stage liver cancer. Dr said he only has a couple of months, maybe less based on the
rapid rate of decline. So I decided that I had to tell my son and his wife that they needed to put
Audrina in dacare. Renee works for Little Sunshine Day, at my sister in law's house. We had a family dinner on Tuesday and
talked about me leaving to be with my dad. Wednesday night I arrived in Temecula and will be here until after my dad passes.
Audrina was told she was going to school like Eddie and Jazmyn and she is adjusting nicely. Hospice came down on Friday and signed
dad up.
We are using the same Hospice Company, Visiting Nurses Association. That evening the hospital bed was brought in
along with a walker and a few other things. Dad was reluctant to start the program and get the bed but now he is glad he has it.
Saturday most of the nephews showed up and loaded a big truck with living dining room furniture from here and then brought in the furniture
from my sister's house. They all took a break as dad treated the "crew" to In and Out. My brother is doing a great job coordinating all the move and the finances. Luckily dad has a living trust to make things easier to handle all dad's affairs.
Dad has had a lot of visitors and the nurses said as long as he wanted company, it was ok but to just watch when he got tired.
His sister came on Sunday as well as my daughter and kids and the pastor of his church.
Yesterday we had a visit from Kim, the main nurse that dad requested who also was here for my mom. They also sent out Vera, the medical Social worker that my mom had. Then Florine came and she will be taking care of my dad's sponge baths.I have been so busy with paperwork, and doing errangs for dad and
arranging phone calls to his friends.
Last night dad asked if his funeral arrangements had been made and I reassured him that things were being taken care of. He asked for a few specific things to be done. I told him we would not rush because we wanted his service to be as beautiful as mom's. I told him we would make sure all his friends new because he had brought it up before. He asked how the montage was going and I told him it was about 75% done and he wants to see it.
So dad has finally accepted that he is dying and I see a little more peace in him now. He has a bad cough and he will start a breathing treatment today.
My sister Terry is sleeping in his room. My nephew Paul flew in from NY last night. Not sure how long he will be here. This is so much harder than when
we lost mom because we had a lot of time with mom and we only found out about dad being so sick in Novemeber.
I did make time to get my blood work and flu shot yesterday and I already got my blood results. Everthing ok except my cholesterol since I stopped taking my medicaion for it. I figured my liver could use the rest but I will have to go back on it because of the family history of heart disease. My dad had a heart attack and triple bypass in 1991. I have a dr appointment on Thursday but I am going to reschedule until after my dad is gone. Family friends are coming in from Texas on Thursday and I want to be here. I better try to get back to sleep for a couple of hours. Please keep praying for us. Thank you.
Jan 7, 2012
Today's Sayings: Prayers needed please.
My brother came down Friday to go to the dr appt. with my dad and sister. Dad's dr is puzzled. His PET scan shows no cancer but the dr is concerned about the fluid in just one lung, rapid decline and weight loss. Some symptoms are because of the liver disease. Dr. wants to consult with the lung and liveer specialist. Dad was a smoker for about 40 years so we think he has lung cancer. Friday evening my nephew stayed with dad so we could go eat. We had a nice long talk before heading back and Scott watched a movie with dad.
Saturday was the day we had to choose all the items in dad's house and it turned out to take longer but we got it done. Kind of bittersweet. We stopped a bit for the Hospice Nurse meeting. She said that she needs dads labs and suggest we wait on the hospice until the drs decided what treatment they want to use. She suggested Home Health care and that sounda like what we need at this point.Home health brings in things to help a patient get better. Hospice brings things to help a patinet be comfortable when nothing more can be done. After she left we continued choosing items.
We prayed together for God to give us strength. I was a bit under the weather and was glad to have my brother, sisters and brother in law to help.
I could not sleep and went to check on my dad and he was awake so we talked a bit. He asked on the selection process went. He was pleased that the itmes were staying in the family. Mom and dad were in the real estate business and there were many times whole estates were sold off to strangers and it sadened my parents. I guess since we are a close family, it is hard to fathom otherwise. Since my dad is not driving anymore, I get to use his car for now. It will go to the estate later and that is handled by my brother.
Dad is having a hard time walking now and is asking to see his friends. He has always liked company. I do appreciate your continued prayers. Thanks friends.
|| My Blog 2011 || My Blog 2010 || My Blog 2009 || My Blog 2008 || My Blog 2007 || My Blog 2006 || My Blog 2005 || My Blog 2004 || My Blog 2003
Some weather Minis by Sonia
Smiles brom Mageguy
background by me